Results from a qualitative study of young adults by Salisbury and Fisher showed that the most common concern among both women and men is the impact that lack of female orgasm during partner sex has on the male ego.
Stress, shame, and guilt are obstacles to mindful presence in every situation, and especially in this incredibly vulnerable context. Instead, both parties become absorbed with the self-critical thoughts in their mind. Stress also kills libido. If our minds are not focused on pleasure, our bodies won't be able to experience it. Our tissues become engorged and lubricated as a physical response to pleasure processed by our brains. If we're not processing the cues our bodies send us, those changes won't happen.
The study also showed that male and female participants agreed that men have the responsibility to physically stimulate their female partner to orgasm, while women have the responsibility to be mentally prepared to experience orgasm.
Basically, women are trying to climax for the sake of their partner's ego. And both partners are placing responsibility on the man to bring the woman to orgasm. That puts a lot of pressure on both women and men in the bedroom and keeps women from becoming fully sexually empowered.