A 5-Step Visualization Exercise That Will Change The Way You Look At Money

For years, my fear around money went something like this: I’d want to do something special, like take a vacation. I’d save the money to do it, and then, when it was time to pull the trigger ... I’d get really, really afraid. It wasn’t a fear that I didn’t have enough saved — it was a fear that once the money was spent, it was gone.

Growing up without a lot of money, I’d experienced food insecurity and knew what it was like to have a car break down by the side of the road or creditors call about unpaid bills. As I got older, I always assumed that someday, when I had enough cash saved, I’d finally treat myself to the things that I had always desired.

It was only after I was unable to actually spend money on myself that I realized something important: My fear wasn’t about the money.

If you've achieved financial security and are still afraid to spend, the fear of not having enough is usually indicative of a fear that you are not enough. You're actually afraid that you don’t have what it takes to withstand hard times. There are, of course, circumstances in which people genuinely do not have enough money. But in cases like mine, the fear is more a reflection of our selves than our wallets.

In order to practice courage with cash, I needed to stop thinking that once my money was spent, I’d be adrift without it. I had to trust my ability to recover from life’s challenges and create a new relationship with money in which it was used as a tool, not a rigidly grasped security blanket.

Did you borrow money from someone, and now you resent having to pay it back? Did you overspend, and now you resent paying the interest? Did you sign up for a gym membership, and now you're bitter that you don’t use it?

You can complete this exercise using insights from the first two steps. Finish this sentence five times: “Around money, I feel…” Negative feelings about money are probably holding more sway over you than your actual bank account numbers.

A helpful way to do this is to look at what you wrote for exercise three, and then think about what its opposites are. If you wrote, “Around money, I feel afraid,” then consider “Around money, I feel confident.”

Remind yourself of your intent when you're holding money, using your credit card, or making a purchasing decision. Close your eyes for a moment and actually practice feeling or visualizing, “Around money, I feel confident.” Whatever your positive money feelings are, find ways to intentionally practice them.

I’m not suggesting that you should go out and mindlessly spend, but I'm encouraging you to look for ways to manifest the positive feelings you desire. For example, practicing “confidence around money” can look like paying bills while taking a moment to appreciate each collector: the electric company that provides electricity, the day care center that delivers your children back to you each day, safely.