One of the most profound moments in my healing path was during a 30-day silent meditation retreat in Nepal, finally, when everything around me and in me was still. I finally had enough space to witness the noise inside me with a distance. After that I made a real commitment to change myself and become someone that adds to life, not subtracts from it.
There comes a point in our lives when we need to stop and reassess our belief systems to truthfully rewire our patterns of thought. We must evolve internally. This is the most profound work, to clean up that dusty mirror that has been passed on from grandmother to mother and now to you. It's time to clean the dust and reframe the mirror and maybe even move it from the bathroom to the front door.
This is why some scientists say humans don't really have free will, because we not only inherit our parents' genetic predisposition but their habits and thought patterns as well. When we finally have some internal space to see them playing out from a distance, we can start to respond to life proactively, not reactively. It's in that space between stimulus and response that we have the opportunity to become compassionate.