We fall in love at close proximity. I mean real love, not the imagined kind that some can conjure up through fantasy or at a distance, or that is really just lust masquerading as love.
The eyes play an important role in igniting real love. When you gaze into your partner’s eyes, you can see not only his or her essence but the entire play of the nervous system. You can witness the live, exciting, and rapidly changing inner landscape of emotion, energy, and reality that belongs to and defines your partner.
It is an unavoidable fact that the body shows signs of deterioration as we age. The most obvious signs, such as changes in hair color, weight, posture, or agility, are apparent at a distance. Closer up, signs of aging include wrinkled skin and gnarled fingers.
But have you noticed the one body part that seems miraculously immune to aging? The eyes! As long as we’re mentally and emotionally healthy, they remain beautiful, vibrant, and vital. It’s as though, through them, we have the means to fall in love at our disposal — permanently. A few minutes of sustained gazing at your partner (or anyone) can lead to relaxation, a sense of safety, and full, here-and-now engagement. Attachment expert Daniel Stern terms this concept, “moments of meeting.”