10 Reasons You Haven't Found Self-Acceptance

For decades, I avoided mirrors, deflected compliments, deleted tagged photos of myself, all because of shame and insecurities. I was at war with myself. The enemy, my body.

When things weren’t going well in my life, my body was to blame. I thought, “If only I were thinner, I’d be more successful, more popular, and I'd finally meet my soul mate.” It never ended. No matter what size my body, whether I was 40 pounds underweight or 60 pounds over, I always felt unworthy.

The problem was never my body or the actual weight; it was my beliefs about it. The way I looked mattered most, and that pain stayed with me for years.

But all that changed when I made falling in love with myself, regardless of my physical size, my full-time mission. Today I accept and love myself. I no longer negotiate with my insecurities.

It was easier to blame my body for things not going well than to take full accountability.

Acceptance and accountability have become my new go-to behaviors, replacing several unhealthy ones. My body, just like my life, is a work in progress. Here are the things I stopped doing to find self-acceptance and real love.

1. I stopped comparing myself to everyone else.

2. I stopped speaking down to myself.

3. I stopped listening to what others said about me and instead listened to my own inner voice.

4. I stopped worrying about the outcome; instead I accepted the moment as it was.

5. I stopped ignoring my body’s needs.

6. I stopped thinking I was wounded, broken, or needed to be fixed.

7. I stopped trusting others’ opinions about my own needs and life.

8. I stopped trusting others’ advice and instead learned to trust myself.

9. I stopped thinking there was destination that would make me happy; I learned to appreciate the journey.