Whether you're aware of it or not, you have a pattern for coping with stress. Unfortunately, most people have found patterns and methods that do not support good health.
If you want to be truly successful in coping with stress, you need to identify negative coping patterns, and replace them with the following, positive ways of coping.
1. Train yourself to think like an optimist.
What distinguishes an optimist from a pessimist is the way in which one explains both good and bad events. Instead of blaming, for example, you recognize that everyone makes mistakes. Instead of getting angry, you forgive. Instead of being down on yourself, you recognize that you did your best, given the circumstances.
2. Make a real effort to talk to yourself in a positive way.
There is a constant dialogue taking place in our heads, and our self-talk makes an impression on our subconscious mind. In order to develop or maintain a positive mental attitude, you must guard against negative self-talk.
Become aware of your self-talk and then consciously work to imprint positive self-talk on the subconscious mind. Two powerful tools for creating positive self-talk are questions and affirmations,
3. Ask better questions.
A powerful tool for improving the quality of self-talk and hence the quality of life is a series of questions originally given to me by Anthony Robbins, author of the bestsellers Unlimited Power and Awaken the Giant Within.
According to Tony, the quality of your life is equal to the quality of the questions you habitually ask yourself. For example: An individual is met with a particular challenge or problem. He or she can ask a number of questions in this situation, such as "Why does this always happen to me?" or, "Why am I always so stupid?"
The answers to these questions don't build self-esteem. A better question would be, "What can I learn from this situation or do to make it better?" If you want more happiness in your life, simply ask yourself the following questions on a consistent basis: "What am I most happy about in my life right now?" and "Why does that make me happy?"
4. Use positive affirmations.
An affirmation is a short statement with some emotional intensity behind it. Positive affirmations can make imprints on the subconscious mind to create a healthy, positive self-image. In addition, affirmations can actually fuel the changes you desire.
You may want to have the following affirmations in plain sight to recite them over the course of the day: