How I Finally Found Friends That Get My Spiritual Side
I went through a major health crisis a few years ago and suddenly found myself feeling very alone. I loved my friends but was no longer able to go out drinking or partying anymore. I also had a burgeoning interest in New Age spirituality and was eager to share everything I was learning.
I knew I needed to make some new friends who shared my love for everything wellness and woo-woo, but I didn't know where to find these hip, heart-centered, crystal-loving ladies. Turns out, they're everywhere. You just have to know where to look. If you’re in the market for some spiritual sisters, here are some great places to start:
1. Go to a local workshop or book signing by your favorite author.
Gabby Bernstein coming to town? Danielle LaPorte? Mastin Kipp? Some other spiritual luminary you’re obsessed with? Go! There are so many other women just like you hungry to connect. If you’re not the type of person who feels comfortable just walking up to people and introducing yourself, then volunteer to help out with the event. I volunteered for one of Gabby’s talks when she came to town last year and met tons of awesome people.
2. Go to a local women’s retreat.
When I first started my spiritual journey I traveled far and wide to go to different retreats, devouring all the knowledge I could get my hands on. I’d connect with people, then go back home and feel isolated once again. Finally, I went to a women’s retreat in the Bay Area—where I live. Sure enough, there were lots of local ladies in attendance. One of them ended up starting a First Fridays Facebook group, and now we get together on a monthly basis to connect.
3. Hire a local life coach.
Again, the key word is local. Life coaches are notoriously well-connected with other heart-centered women. Tell your new coach one of your goals is to make some spiritual girlfriends. Ask her what local events she’d recommend you go to, or ask for introductions to her other clients. Many life coaches will have monthly meetings or even retreats with all their clients. You can meet people that way, too.
4. Do yoga (even if you don't love it).
I don’t particularly enjoy yoga. I do it because it’s good for me but also because women who do yoga are awesome. Stick with the same class every week so you continue to interact with the same people. A lot of friendships get developed simply as a result of continuing to show up.
5. Talk to an intuitive healer.
Instead of buying that extra pair of shoes you don’t need, go to a local psychic, Reiki master, or intuitive healer. These people have serious ties to the spiritual community, not to mention that the fundamental goal of these sessions is to help you get (and stay) in touch with yourself. A lot of these teachers also have workshops and/or seminars where you can meet like-minded folks. Ask the experts if there are any events coming up they’re excited about. Follow them on Facebook or sign up for their newsletters so you’re aware of anything cool happening in your area.
6. Try meetup.com.
A good friend of mine met her entire spiritual social circle by going to a Danielle LaPorte Desire Map Meetup. Don’t see one you like? Host your own.
7. Find a "connector."
According to Malcolm Gladwell, a connector is someone who knows a lot of people, goes to (or hosts) tons of events, and wants as many people to be involved as possible. Their motto is “The more the merrier.” Make friends with one of these types and sit back as you watch the invites just roll in. I have a few of these awesome, dynamic people in my life and they keep me very busy.
8. Go to church.
I had a strong aversion to churches because of my strict religious upbringing but soon found that they are not all created equal. When looking for New Age girlfriends, a nondenominational church is your best bet. Before going, check out their website and see what kind of classes they have. That should give you a good idea of what they’re all about.
9. Trust the universe.
I mean if you’re on a spiritual path, that’s really the name of the game, right? Sometimes you don’t have to do anything but trust and pay attention. I had just started my journey into spirituality when I was at a restaurant with my husband. Next to me, a woman was talking about Doreen Virtue and her angel cards. I immediately got up and introduced myself, and she was beyond excited to talk to me. We’re still friends today.
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Abbey Campbell Cook studied creative writing at UC Berkeley. She now writes (and sometimes sings and dances) about her ongoing quest for spiritual and physical wellness on her blog, Adventures in Woo Woo Land, which often includes pictures of Channing Tatum in his underwear (Ryan Gosling too, if you're lucky). She is also the author of The Lucidity Project (She Writes Press; May 31, 2016).