I’ve learned a lot about sex and dating in my life—especially over the past four years as I've traveled, dated, and had sex in countries across the globe. It's not that we don't want deep connection; it’s that, at this point in our evolution, many humans are unwilling to sacrifice freedom and growth in order to get it. To me, having an evolved one-night stand means not trading deep emotional intimacy for physical proximity.
We are hungry for growth, so we’re looking for relationships where we’re constantly being pushed to learn, to grow, and to evolve. In my travels, I see so many young people opting for diverse connections with a variety lovers rather than settling on the traditional, monogamous connection with one person. We have become a society of information gatherers, each experience we have giving us valuable data on what we do and don’t like, on the inner workings of other people and of the universe.
Historically, marriage held several important functions: People married for safety, for survival, for security. Those imperatives are no longer relevant. In the 21st century, we have the space to challenge our traditions and the freedom to develop our own opinions on what kind of relationships will be the most fulfilling to us. Open relationships are being discussed more, well, openly than perhaps ever before. Looking back through history across cultures and generations, it becomes clear that true monogamy really only pervaded in a small segment of the world’s population for a rather short (relatively speaking) period.