What To Do When You Truly, Madly, Deeply Miss Someone...
Over the last year, six of my very close friends moved to California and, with another friend just added to that list, I had to stop and take a look at this.
Although I understand that each of these friends is making the right decision for their lives, it brings up this awkward and uncomfortable feeling of missing someone.
What is that?
It feels intense and the worst part is that you feel completely out of control because there isn’t a whole lot that you can do about it.
Have you ever felt that before?
Whether it be an ex-love, a loved one who has passed on, or something as simple as a friend moving away, I want you to know that the deep longing you are feeling is not to be pushed away or judged.
It is to be felt and embraced.
So you might be thinking yeah that’s great Nitika but how do i feel and embrace it?
Well I can only tell you what works for me but I hope you will try some of my methods out and I am confident if you do, you will feel a sense of relief.
1. Listen to music that showcases how you are feeling.
Ever since I can remember, music has always been the fastest way that I feel connected to my spirit, heart and soul. So when I feel this way I love to go for a walk and listen to music. For times of sadness, Adele’s entire latest album “21” is the perfect fit.
If you’re really deep in your sadness, you might want to create a playlist (or a mix tape) of songs that remind you of that other person. Doing this will allow you to really feel your feelings. It’s okay to bare your soul, break down or cry. Because through that breakdown comes your breakthrough and you will experience more peace, calm and joy.
2. Create an email account for your deepest inner thoughts.
I also started something this past year that I highly recommend: I created an email account for the sole purpose of writing my deepest inner thoughts. I found that although I love the idea of writing in my journal, I was at my computer more than I was with a journal in hand, so when I feel the need to write (which is pretty often) I email myself a “journal” entry and it allows for my blocks and emotions to naturally be released and move through me.
3. Write them a thank you letter.
People play important roles in our lives as we are all connected. They come, go and stay a while throughout our life time, each baring a special gift.
Sit with your emotions you have for them and then mentally place a light around them. What have they taught you? What joy did they bring to you? What did you learn from them?
Kindly, gently and with much love, write them a thank you letter expressing your gratitude for what they’ve shown or given you. If you are releasing a past love, then maybe you want to thank them for all the good times or the spark of light that they showed you.
If it's a friendship, simply thank them for being who they are and showing up for you when you needed it the most. There is always something you can thank someone for. Dig deep, allow something beautiful to come through.
The most important thing here is to allow your feelings to come up and also allow them to be with you. After some time they will ease. Think of this as a development in your relationship. In order for your friendships and relationships to grow they must rise to a new level. If you are missing someone today, close your eyes, think of that person, and send them a huge ball of love and light. Wherever they are they will feel it.