11 Expert-Approved Sex Positions For Couples With High Sex Drives
No two sex drives are exactly the same, but if you or your partner—or both of you—have a high sex drive, you're probably always looking for ways to spice things up in the sheets.
Luckily, there's no shortage of positions out there to try, so we asked the experts which ones are best to satisfy the horniest of couples.
What makes a position good for people with a high sex drive?
Depending on what they're looking for, people with a high sex drive might particularly enjoy positions that allow for deep thrusting or positions that can help the sex last longer, according to certified sex therapist Megan Fleming, Ph.D.
Ideally, you'll want to mix it up, switching from more intense positions to ones that allow you to slow down and not get tired out.
The great part about having multiple types of positions in your arsenal is it allows you to adjust based on what the moment calls for.
If you want to slow it down but keep the momentum going, you can—and then when the time comes, you can switch to something more vigorous.
Here are 11 positions to get you started (and keep you going).
11 positions to try:
1. Doggy style
Doggy style is a classic position in which the receiver is usually on their hands and knees with their partner entering from behind, whether anally or vaginally. Doggy style is great for high sex drives, according to Fleming, because it allows for greater depth of penetration from behind. Plus, it's versatile, as you can both be on your knees, one partner can stand over the bed, or both of you can be standing.
Similar to doggy style but a bit more vigorous, wheelbarrow involves the person receiving to wrap their legs around their partner. You can get into this position by starting in doggy style and having your partner help you lift your legs back and up, wrapping them around their back. You're guaranteed deep penetration, Fleming adds; plus, it's a pretty good workout for both of you.
3. Elevated missionary
Liven up your usual missionary with something like a pillow or wedge, to raise the pelvis of the person on the bottom. "Great sex is all about angles," Fleming explains, so find ways you can elevate the pelvis to allow for more friction and pressure.
Initiating Conversations About Sexual Likes & Dislikes
When the time comes to slow it down, consider getting into the lotus sex position, or yab-yum as it's referred to in tantric practices. One partner sits upright with their legs crossed, and their partner sits on top of them, straddling them and wrapping their legs around their back. Fleming says it's great for intimacy, as "there's the eye gazing, and you can synchronize your breathing." Plus, it's a slower position that involves more grinding than thrusting, which can help with stamina.
5. Mutual masturbation
Less of a position but still great for high sex drives, mutual masturbation gives you a lot of control over your own stamina and can help build intimacy with your partner, explains Gigi Engle, Zumio's brand expert and certified clinical sexologist. "I suggest being on your back for the most visually open viewing experience for your partner," she says.
You can both masturbate together, or if you're the one who's horny and your partner doesn't necessarily need to get off at the moment, they can join in by watching you and enjoying the show or assisting in simple ways, she adds. "For instance, they could suck on your nipples, run their hands between your inner thighs, or even put a G-spot wand inside you while you use a clitoral toy."
The 69 is a tried-and-true oral sex position for a reason. Both partners can enjoy receiving stimulation while also pleasing their partner. Fleming notes that sometimes it can be a bit distracting to give and receive at the same time, but if you're looking to last longer, that may not be a bad thing. "It's sustainable, and there's something to be said about the teasing factor," she adds.
7. Sideways 69
While 69-ing is great for stamina, Fleming notes it's important to be mindful of your neck if you're doing this for a long time. If you've never done so, you might want to give sideways 69 a try. Both partners can lie on their sides rather than the person on top potentially cramping up their neck. After all, pulling a neck muscle isn't exactly sexy. This position can thus help partners keep the action going for longer.
To do the cowgirl, the partner with the penis or strap-on lies on their back, while the receiver straddles them and rides. Not only are women more likely to reach orgasm on top, Fleming notes, but this is another position that involves less thrusting and more grinding and rocking of the pelvis. "Because there's less thrusting, it can really last longer," she explains.
9. Reverse cowgirl
The reverse cowgirl is exactly what it sounds like: Do the cowgirl, but have the person on top spin around so they're facing their partner's feet. This is another good one for women who like being on top, and it can be fun for the person on the bottom to get a different view. It's also a position that allows for clitoral stimulation along with penetration, making an orgasm more likely. (Potentially even a blended orgasm, aka a simultaneous clitoral and vaginal orgasm.)
Another option for when you want to slow things down but keep the heat going, try spooning when you're starting to feel tired out or you're getting close to finishing and want to last longer. You can enjoy vaginal or anal penetration while spooning, and Fleming says this position is great for G-spot stimulation. This one helps sex last longer because you can really take it slow and enjoy the intimacy of this cuddly position.
11. Standing with one leg raised
Standing sex can be fun because it can get you out of bed, where most of your sex is likely happening. It's also a good workout, Fleming notes. There are a handful of ways to have sex standing up, but the receiving partner raising one leg will allow for deeper penetration and stimulation for both people, and of course, you can stand virtually anywhere you want. (Different locations can be extra exciting!)
Other tips and tricks for satisfying a high sex drive:
1. Try new things
Along with trying new positions, Fleming says it's a good idea to open your mind to other new things as well, such as toys, anal play, watching porn, and/or incorporating a bit of kink, if you're into it. Things like light restraints or blindfolds are a good place to start, she adds; "If you cut off one of your senses, you heighten the others."
2. Get on top
"If you're the partner with the higher sex drive, be willing to get on top," Engle says. If your partner isn't as fired up as you are, they may not be as willing to get on top, and "asking someone who is tired or less ready to rumble to do all the work in bed will likely lead to less sex in the future," she adds.
3. Don't be afraid to ask for oral
Lastly, Engle says oral sex can be a good option if one partner isn't as aroused as the other but they're still willing to go down on you. Obviously, don't beg them if they're not in the mood, but at least sometimes, she says, they might be happy to please you with no expectation of receiving themselves. "This won't work for everyone, as some people who aren't in the mood for sex like straight up are not in the mood for sex," she adds, "but it can work for others."
At the end of the day, satisfying sex will look different for everyone, and couples with particularly high sex drives might need to do a bit of experimenting to figure out what really gets the job done for them. You'll never know if you never try, so be open to new things, enjoy the intimacy, and just have fun with it.
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