Sometimes you can just sense when your relationship is falling apart. The energy is off, negative, or tense, or maybe you've actually been fighting a lot without any satisfying resolution.

If you're facing the possibility of a breakup right now, don't lose hope just yet. Just because you're in hot water doesn't necessarily mean you need to throw in the towel. If you care deeply about your partner and you're both committed to making the relationship work, there's almost always a way to rebuild.

Many people enter a particularly rough patch in their relationship—an awful fight or transgression, a grueling and unspoken sex drought, a dysfunctional pattern that has repeated itself one too many times—and begin to head for the exit. But that's giving up too soon, whether out of fear, frustration, or laziness. The truth is, many couples really can work through their difficulties if they're both willing to put in the effort.

Don't sit around trying to fix your relationship all by yourself—it just won't work. Get your partner involved if they aren't already: Talk to them honestly about your concerns, and let them know that you're contemplating whether the relationship can really work. Don't threaten them with a breakup, but make sure they truly understand how seriously you're taking these issues.

"Try not to blindside them, especially if you haven't shared those concerns before. Give them a chance to change," Zimmerman says. "Be kind but totally honest. This is the time when there's nothing to lose."

Beware the trap of blame. You can be upset with something your partner is doing, but at the same time, make sure you're taking time to seriously reflect on the ways you've also contributed to the dynamic, negative energy, and problems between you.

"Most people are clear on what their partner is doing that is causing the problems but not clear on what they are doing," Paul tells mbg. "You take yourself with you, which means that you will take with you into your next relationship any unhealed patterns that are your contribution to the problems."

This is separate from just recognizing your own contribution to your relationship's troubled waters. This is about recognizing the inner work you have left to do on yourself.

"Many people who leave are no happier than they were in the relationship," Paul says. "If you have been making your partner responsible for your feelings and you are blaming your partner for your unhappiness, then it likely isn't time to leave. You have your own inner work to do."

Oftentimes, many of the problems that emerge in our lives are directly related to underlying mental or emotional struggles we ourselves have been dealing with all along, Paul says: "If you ignore your feelings, judge yourself, turn to various addictions to numb your feelings, or make your partner responsible for your feelings of worth and safety, then you are rejecting and abandoning yourself, and you have inner work to do to learn to love yourself. People tend to treat us the way we treat ourselves, so focus on how you are treating yourself rather than how your partner is treating you."

During this trying time, you need to love yourself now more than ever. What can you do to manifest more self-love right now?

It's easy to fall into the trap of ruminating over your relationship and getting caught up in your own difficult emotions around it, but relationship and well-being coach Shula Melamed, M.A., MPH, emphasizes the importance of taking time to see things from your partner's perspective. You're not the only one who's struggling right now. Right now, the person you love most is also going through something very painful. Can you find a way to show up and be there for them?

As you're working to rebuild your relationship, remember to take a breath from focusing on all the bad and spend some time reflecting on the good parts. What are some of your fondest memories together? What things about your partner bring you joy, inspire you, or amaze you? Don't spend all your conversations talking about the heavy stuff, Zimmerman recommends; make a point of trying to have some fun and ease, too.

"Tap into the reasons you got together in the first place—access that love—but also know you can't go back," she says. "Commit to a process with this person to bring your relationship to a new, good place."

Don't roll your eyes! When your relationship feels like it's falling apart, it's easy to forget all the good things your partner brings to your life in spite of the ongoing tensions. One simple, ongoing way to make sure you're focusing on the good is to simply make a point of expressing gratitude to your partner each day.

"Instead of taking for granted the things that your partner does on a daily basis to make your life together easier, better, run more efficiently—acknowledge and thank them," Melamed says. "This will strengthen your ability to appreciate one [another] and create an atmosphere where you understand how you collaborate in many ways. It may also inspire you to do more for one another as the positive feedback that comes in creates a positive and more supportive environment."

Keep these tips in mind as you move forward working with your partner. With dedication, understanding, care, and generosity, you can make it through this turbulent season with time. Remember: On the other side of this winter is spring.\