9 Ways To Manifest Someone Into Your Life, According To Spiritual Experts

Manifestation is anything but waving a magic wand. This is especially the case when you're attempting to manifest someone rather than something.

Humans are filled with convoluted mental and emotional energy—it's our nature. So yes, you may have heard success stories of manifesting a romantic partner, a business partner, a fling, or even a new friend, but it takes quite a bit of aligned action.

Manifestation is a process of internal transformation and external actualization. It's a method of turning inward to fully embody your most authentic expression in order to get clear on what you actually seek, then making that desire a reality. 

Can you manifest anything and anyone? The catch is that it must be within the bounds of your reality—and our minds must be primed to believe that it can realistically bring the manifestation to fruition. Anything that is an untethered form of delusion can lead to disappointment. 

When it comes to manifesting someone specifically, it's important to note that you cannot manifest on someone else's behalf. Period.

According to cognitive behavioral therapy, there's a lot of science behind "feeling is healing." This methodology shows when you change your feelings, you change your behavior, which changes your life. When you're able to think more clearly, you're able to take actions that align more with your manifestations.  

"When you get clear on what you want and how you want to feel, you activate your reticular activating system1 (RAS)," says Amy Chan, founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, a retreat that takes a scientific and spiritual approach to healing the heart. Your RAS helps you filter out the information you don't need and focus on the information you do need.

If you don't know what you want and what you like, then how will a partner know? "A relationship is like two circles joining, versus one half completing the other," Chan tells mindbodygreen. 

Dating yourself can look like literally taking yourself on dates. Try exploring one of Julia Cameron's coined "artist dates"—a festive, solo expedition to explore something that interests you. Diving deep into true self-discovery will not only strengthen the bonds to your most authentic expression, nurturing self-love but will also help you break the confines of possible societal or familial programming.

"When you are a walking example of what you want to call in and you're exuding that energy, [you] become a magnet," explains intuitive healer and manifestation expert Joy Dushey.

There are a couple of different types of lists that can help with manifesting someone into your life. One option would be to write out what you're looking for in a partner. Note: It's best to focus on not only the external characteristics but the internal as well. Most importantly, focus on the feeling. 

"You want to start connecting to that feeling so it's not so foreign when you experience it…because it may not always look like what you're intellectually thinking," Chan explains. 

Can't quite pull a specific list together? Try either free-writing or morning pages (another Julia Cameron tool). By putting a pen to paper, you're able to get out of your head and delve deeper into your subconscious. It's also an incredible tool to cleanse negative thoughts. 

As neuroscientist and manifesting aficionado Tara Swart, M.D., Ph.D., previously explained to mindbodygreen, journaling can also help you recognize a scarcity mindset versus an abundance mindset—because manifestation simply doesn't work with a scarcity mindset.

Similar to writing a list, try to visualize your dream life as if your special someone is already present in your life. "Get yourself in a meditative state, and begin to associate with it by feeling into the details with your partner," Chan recommends.

A vision board is a physical (or digital) representation of your manifestation. To make one, look for images that showcase what you are calling in and pin them—you could even keep them in a digital folder on your phone or computer if you're not particularly crafty.  

And if you're creating a board, try using the feng shui bagua map as a guide. The upper right-hand corner is the energy center of relationships. When you're done, make sure to put your board somewhere visible so you're regularly reminded about your goals and desires. 

Affirmations are phrases that state what energy we would like to embody in the present moment. "I am..." statements are the most common, but they can take other forms like "I will..." or "I believe..."

Simply reciting these affirmations alone will not manifest someone into your life, but by grounding these statements in the present tense, you're acknowledging that your highest self is already here, within. (Versus if you continue to speak in the future sense, which creates distance between yourself and your manifestations.)

Be sure that affirmations are still realistic, too. As Chan explains, "If your brain actually doesn't believe [the affirmation], it inherently rejects it as true. It could actually do more damage. So you never want to go with the total opposite of what you believe. Start with something closer to the truth."

Release the stress and pressure of manifesting by finding a manifestation partner in crime! This can be a solo friend or a collective community. 

If you're overly tethered to timelines, you're setting yourself up for disappointment—because your manifestations may very well arrive in a way that's completely unexpected. 

"Some have this picture of how a partner is going to look, and that can actually backfire on you because of your reticular activating system (RAS)," Chan explains.

As aforementioned, your RAS helps you filter out the information that you don't need and focus in on the information that you do need. So, as Chan notes, if you're only focused on people that look a certain way, "you may completely surpass a fully aligned partner because you were blinded."

You can absolutely manifest someone into your life, but there's no one-size-fits-all approach. True manifestation is an inside job, and like any practice for personal growth, it comes down to tuning in to what works for you and taking aligned action.