eHarmony vs. OKCupid: Which Dating App Is Better? We Tried Them Both
In testing eHarmony and OKCupid, I learned a lot about myself as a dater. Plus, I got a peek behind the curtain of these popular dating apps and now have a better understanding of who will find success on each.
Setting up a profile on eHarmony
I'll be honest, setting up a profile on eHarmony is time-consuming—but it's well worth it.
To start, you'll be prompted to give basic information such as your name, age, location, and so on. You'll also add up to 12 profile photos.
Next, you'll answer a series of questions that allow you to get a bit more personal about who you are and what you're looking for.
First, you'll be given questions such as "Is cheating OK in a relationship?" or "Would you and your partner share a room or have separate rooms?"
The next set of questions will go deeper into how you'd view your ideal partner. Some questions will give you up to 10 answers to select from, and you can choose up to five answers per question.
- Question: What do you want your partner to like about you?
- Answers to choose from: cheerful, humorous, honest, empathetic, affectionate, reserved, sporty, optimistic, etc.
- Question: What do you think is most important in a relationship?
- Answers to choose from: Giving each other a lot of space, considering each other in what you want, making life easier and peaceful for one another, accepting our imperfections, always trying new things, sticking to a routine, not examining everything in depth
- Question: Which of the following do your friends and family think about you?
- Answers to choose from: Always up for anything fun, always optimistic, thinks a lot—and seriously—about life, is a bit of a daydreamer, deals with problems in an objective and thoughtful manner, always finds a good solution for herself even in unpleasant situations, calm and level-headed, actively participates in everything
The next set of questions is where eHarmony really unique. The app shows a series of shapes and pictures, allowing you to choose the most aesthetically pleasing ones.
In the fourth set of questions, you'll answer questions about everyday habits and your outlook on life. Some prompts are short and straight to the point, where you'll select one out of two or three answers, while others are more complex. See examples of my questions below:
- Question: Regardless of current trends, is the style and color of your clothing mostly…
- Answers: Restrained and muted or bold and extravagant
- Question: Put yourself in the following situation: Imagine that you've slipped on a banana peel lying on the ground. You are not injured but people have stopped to look and someone is trying to help you out. What is your first reaction?
The last set of questions will really make you think about how you feel about yourself and about love. Here are just a few of the questions I answered:
- Answer A: Yes
- Answer B: As a whole yes
- Answer C: It depends
- Answer D: I'm sometimes unhappy about it
- Answer A: Absolutely
- Answer B: I want to
- Answer C: Sometimes it's hard to believe
- Answer D: It just depends on the situation
Yes, it might feel like you've been answering questions for an hour at this point—but I loved the thorough and unique profile design of eHarmony. It's a refreshing break from the same old prompts and responses on other dating apps, and it allows you to think more intentionally about what you're looking for.
Plus, I love knowing everyone on the app has taken this time to set up their own profile.
Setting up a profile on OKCupid
When creating my profile on OKCupid, I started off by filling out basic information like name, age, location, and the type of relationship I'm looking for. Next, I added a paragraph summary including a bit about my hobbies and interests.
While thorough, OKCupid's profile setup takes a bit less time than eHarmony. After I completed my bio and added my photos, I answered a series of questions like the ones below:
- What are your political views?
- Do you like scary movies?
- Could you date someone who is messy?
- Would you date someone with a large amount of debt
- Do you often find yourself worrying about things that you have no control over?
You can also choose to answer questions pertaining to your weight, height, languages you speak, education level, employment status, astrological signs, and more.
After answering these questions, I was ready to swipe left to pass and right to like. Within just a week of being active on the app, I received 99+ matches.
How eHarmony works
Once your profile is set up, eHarmony is pretty simple to navigate.
I'll note, there's a big difference between the paid version of eHarmony and the free version. You must have a premium membership to see people's photos and full profiles and to send messages.
The membership costs between $20 and $42 per month (we'll break down these costs in just a few) and comes with other fun perks such as seeing who has viewed your profile.
To begin finding matches, you can search for people based on the preferences you've chosen; on each profile you'll see a compatibility score.
Based on a quiz you take at sign-up, eHarmony's compatibility score really sets it apart from other dating apps. You instantly feel more intentional and informed when swiping on potential matches than just looking at prompts and photos alone.
eHarmony's fact file feature, which is a list of features like height, ethnicity, smoking habits, workout frequency, religion, etc., was also very useful because for me, being matched with someone who has the same interests and values is important. There are also data metrics in the eHarmony app that allowed me to look at my personality profile analysis to determine information about how you interact with your environment. See my personality profile analysis below:
How OKCupid works
Since its launch in 2004, OKCupid has been connecting compatible couples and long-lasting relationships. With its vast array of questions and a strong algorithm, meeting your match isn't quite as difficult as it sounds.
On each profile, you get a percentage score that tells you how compatible you are with that user based on three factors: what you tell the app you're looking for in a partner, what that person tells the app they are looking for in a partner, and how you both answer the matching questions.
Michael Kaye, director of brand and communications at OKCupid, weighs in on the app's successful compatibility methods.
"Each and every question is personalized to each user," Kaye explains. "For example, there are specific questions that LGBTQ+ users may get, or depending on geography and location you'll get different questions. This means that not everyone will see and have the same questions as others."
Kaye says there have been almost 200 million responses to OKCupid's questions in 2023 alone, and almost 10 billion since the app's launch.
To me, OKCupid really stands out in the dating world because it is easy to use and asks questions other apps aren't asking.
A premium membership on OKCupid starts at $45 per month—but the app's free membership is far more substantial than the free eHarmony plan, with access to most basic features.
eHarmony vs. OKCupid: Comparing the costs
There are multiple eHarmony plans to choose from including premium light for six months, premium plus for 12 months, and premium extra for 24 months. Here's how it all breaks down. You can save 20% on any plan with code MBG20.
- $249 or $41.50 per month
- $339 or $28.25 per month (currently 32% off)
- $479 or $19.96 per month (currently 52% off)
As far as pricing for OKCupid, you can sign up for premium under their current deal, which gives you 50% off your first month. Right now this plan is currently, $22.49, as opposed to their regular price of $44.99, and you get a ton of perks like the ones listed below:
- 3 free superlikes per week
- Send unlimited likes
- See who likes you
OKCupid also allows you to boost your profile to allow more people to see your profile for 30 minutes, guaranteed to increase your matches up to 5x. You can also superboost to increase your chances even more. These are purchased based on time. Here's how those costs break down:
- 1 Boost: $6.99
- 5 Boosts: $29.99 ($5.99 each)
- 10 Boosts: $49.99 ($4.99 each)
- 3 Hours: $29.99
- 6 Hours: $44.99
- 12 Hours: $59.99
How dating impacts longevity
Dating apps like OKCupid and eHarmony bring an endless amount of opportunity to build relationships, enhance your well-being, and thereby improve your longevity. And connecting with people on dating apps can feel exciting if you're doing it right.
Relationship coach and dating expert Susan Trotter agrees—that's why she recommends dating apps to all her clients.
How to use dating apps more effectively
"[Dating apps] are a great way to meet people that you might not otherwise meet in your everyday life," Trotter says, adding that more and more people are meeting their partners on dating apps these days.
Per Trotter, your success with dating apps comes down to understanding how to make them work for you. "In general, know how to present yourself, how to assess other profiles, how to use the messaging to gather more information, how to move off the site and plan a first date and beyond," she explains.
Before joining dating apps, Trotter says it's important to reflect and look at patterns in previous relationships to figure out likes and dislikes.
"Take time to do your work to understand your relationship history, what worked and what didn't in the past, what you want and need now compared to the past, and what role you played in previous dynamics," Trotter adds.
Based on Trotter's advice, you'll be most successful on dating apps if you've already worked through the patterns that have not served you in past relationships.
Is OKCupid for hookups or relationships?
While some users may be looking for hookups or casual relationships, we've found that users who are more serious about creating and maintaining long-lasting relationships and falling in love tend to gravitate toward OKCupid. With the high success rate of happy couples, we'd say it's more for relationships.
Is eHarmony better than other dating apps?
Dating apps all depend on the individual and what they are looking for! Some people prefer eHarmony and like it better, while others prefer apps like OKCupid, Hinge, Bumble, Tinder, and others.
We've featured eHarmony in a number of our roundups, including the best dating apps for serious relationships, for working professionals, and for people over 50. But I'm a 24-year-old and I love the app, too!
Does anyone still use OKCupid?
Yes! There are over 4 million matches on OKCupid per week, meaning that thousands of users are using and loving OKCupid. There have also been over 200 million question responses this year alone on the OKCupid app.
There are so many benefits to both apps; when it comes to eHarmony vs. OKCupid, you just have to figure out which one you think you'll like better. For those who are looking to get more intentional with their dating app, you can't go wrong with either, Getting the chance to connect with like-minded people who have the same interests and values as you is an incredible opportunity, and both apps offer users the chance to do just that. For more on how to date intentionally, check out our picks for the best dating apps for serious relationships.
Lauryn Jiles is a freelance writer and editor in the fashion, entertainment, health, beauty, lifestyle, and education verticals. She has worked with companies and publications like Hasbro (Marvel, My Little Pony, Dungeons & Dragons, etc.), Bustle Digital Group (Fatherly & The Zoe Report), DotDash Meredith (InStyle & Byrdie), Teen Vogue, The Black Leaf Tea, CR Fashion Book, Essence, and more! Her hobbies include yoga, aerial, fashion photography, traveling, trying new coffee and tea shops, and tennis. You can read her work here: https://linktr.ee/lmjiles.