Knowing that sex is a major energy source, I love to have a lot of it.
I'm interested in mastery and transcendence. Applied to sex, that involves amplifying the power and pleasure it gives us. Most people, even if they are sexually active, don’t harness and utilize the power of their sexual energy. The leak it out unconsciously.
Every time you have sex, you have the power to create new life. What if you can take that power and channel it into your day-to-day existence?
The life force energy that is the essence of our sexual connection builds and peaks at orgasm.
Most sexual encounters follow a similar trajectory: there is an ascension, we reach a peak of pleasure at orgasm and this is followed by intense pelvic contractions and a burst of ecstasy. Then we see an energetic descent.
What if there didn’t have to be a decline?
You can tap into that cycle and draw that energy back in for yourself. After sex, you ought to feel vibrant, witty, calm, heart-centered, tingly-all-over and happy to be alive.
If you don’t, you aren’t doing it right. I’m serious.
Men are especially vulnerable to this energy loss. The cliche of the man who has sex and rolls over and goes to sleep is a cliche for a reason: It happens far too often.
One of the major reasons I took up Tantra and Taoist sexual energy practices (beyond the spiritual dimension they add to sex) was so I could train my lovers to last much longer.
I like marathon sex.
I love to go deeper and deeper and experience the sense of transcending in myself, and into new levels with my partner. I get really high off this kind of gourmet, five-star sex. It feeds my relationship and my life.
The key to all of this is expanding and recirculating your orgasmic energy. At that orgasmic peak I described, most people eject all of that high quality energy out of their bodies. Instead, you bring it back in.
You do this through breathing.
Do you practice yoga? Great. This will be easy for you.
That four-count inhale, four-count exhale (or longer) Vinyasa flow breath will serve you well here.
As we see in yoga, breath carries energy. We could even say that one of the main points of yoga is the movement of energy; releasing and clearing stagnant energy and bringing awareness to unconscious areas in our physical and emotional bodies. The poses are simply vehicles for this process.
The same applies in sex. By ensuring we breathe steadily throughout the sexual encounter, we redistribute our sexual energy throughout our bodies. This energy is even stronger and denser than regular chi or prana. In fact, the Taoists had a separate name for it: “ji.”
When we recirculate this potent “ji” throughout our systems, less of it escapes at the moment of orgasm. In fact, it doesn’t have to escape at all.
Most people tend to hold the breath, breathe very shallow and tighten up the body as they approach orgasm. All of these things curtail energy flow.
Imagine having sex that’s like a yoga class: You breathe steadily throughout. When you get into a demanding position, instead of holding your breath, you learn to default to your breath. It carries you through to the other side. Afterward, you feel like you broke through some stuck part of yourself. You’ve grown.
Using sex and the breath this way has the same power to find your stuck and inflexible areas and release them.
It’s very, very powerful.
The expanded orgasm...
What happens when you expand this flow of sexual energy is that you expand the experience of orgasm. It goes from being a very distinct burst of pleasure, to a feeling that spreads throughout the body, giving rise to the term full-body orgasm.
And it goes on. And on. And on. For hours. Sometimes days. Even when the physical contact stops, the feelings carry on.
Imagine being perched on the edge of orgasm all night. Or day. You can ride this edge for as long and as deeply as you can breathe.
Although this might sound torturous to some (a good kind of torture), trust me, it’s pure euphoria. By channelling your sexual energy consciously in your body, that flow spreads into all that you do. You feel revitalized, connected and tuned into the rhythms of life.
It also puts you in the running with Sting for marathon sex.