4 Questions Every Woman Needs To Ask Her OB/GYN — Before Reaching Menopause

As an OB/GYN, I hear all kinds of issues from my patients—from painful intercourse to vaginal discomfort—especially when there are questions about the way the female body ages and what to expect. Having practiced as a gynecologist for over 40 years, I've heard and seen it all.

And the more open our society has become, the more comfortable my patients have become asking me personal and important questions about the changes in their bodies over time. On the other hand, I still find myself surprised by how many women feel uncomfortable talking about these topics.

Many women are ill at ease discussing the physical changes they'll undergo, specifically after menopause, for reasons we can all relate to: They're embarrassed or feel that their health care provider, or partner, or close friends may not understand.

But let me remind you how normal and important it is to discuss anything you might be struggling with. You're not alone, and there's no need to suffer in silence.

Often my patients will note that they have been experiencing a low sex drive. As I continue the conversation I often learn they are actually experiencing painful intercourse due to vaginal dryness.

Yes, up to 40 percent of postmenopausal women experience vaginal atrophy, and painful intercourse is a common symptom. While most women are familiar with and talk about hot flashes and night sweats, fewer women are aware of these vaginal symptoms or may not connect them to a treatable, medical condition called postmenopausal vaginal atrophy. Postmenopausal vaginal atrophy is caused by lack of estrogen, which can lead to atrophy, or thinning of tissue, of the vagina and lower urinary tract.

There are a number of reasons health care providers may not bring up menopausal symptoms during your annual visit, and I can't stress enough—you are not alone. There's generally a checklist of items health care providers are interested in learning about during any average annual visit—all of which they need to address in a short amount of time—allowing important topics such as sex during and postmenopause to slip to the back burner as the checkup and medical history usually take priority. On top of that, patients may not be aware that symptoms such as painful intercourse and vaginal dryness are part of a treatable medical condition.

The best way to ensure you are getting what you need from your health care provider is to step up to the plate and start the conversation. Come prepared to your appointment with questions or topics that have caused a concern for you. By having your questions written down, you may feel more at ease, and if you are still nervous about discussing the symptoms or your sex life with your health care provider, bring a partner or close friend who may help you feel more comfortable during this conversation.

As the conversation progresses, if your health care provider seems a bit distracted or if there is not enough time to discuss everything you'd like, feel empowered to make a separate appointment to specifically discuss the menopausal changes you may be going through. You can find additional resources to help guide your conversation by visiting talkchange.com.