5 Most Important Things I Learned About Sex From Teaching Human Sexuality

I have always been an openly sex positive person, so when I had the opportunity to teach human sexuality to college students I jumped at the chance. Having just completed my M.A. in Social Psychology, as a young 24 year-old, I thought I knew a lot about sex. But, as it happens, my perspective was broadened and I developed a whole new understanding of the subject. Here are the five most important things I learned in seven years of teaching the Psychology of Human Sexuality:

There is an immense variation in natural human sexual behavior, ranging for example, from someone who masturbates 10 times a day to someone who masturbates once in 10 years. Both are equally legitimate from a scientific perspective. Attempting to standardize or cast judgments across a species with so much variety would be profoundly unscientific. Many of my students find this to be a huge weight off their shoulders, having grown up feeling ashamed, embarrassed, or judged because of their sexuality.

I will never forget being approached after a class by one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen, who was in tears about how fat and unattractive she felt. I blame the media, but I also blame parents for not taking the time to educate their children about positive self-esteem and the manipulative intent of the mainstream media.

So please enjoy sex, but remember to be safe and selective. Trust your instincts and if you can’t imagine intimately sharing your energy or space with that person, avoid sexual contact.

The list goes on, but suffice it to say, the oppression of the women of planet earth is very real and highly disturbing. Thankfully we are blessed with freedom fighters like Eve Ensler of the V-Day organization but the battle for true equality is far from over. I still maintain hope that as people continue to awaken and raise the planet’s vibration, things will change and the violence will stop. But it starts with each of us!

New information appears all the time, so what we think we know can also change. For example, until 1975 homosexuality was classified as a form of mental illness, but now we know that this is definitely not the case. Scientific breakthroughs in the field of sexology are happening every day, but researchers could always use more funding and more institutional support. Who knows what the future may teach us, but I look forward to finding out!