8 Things Preventing You From Having Greater Happiness & Fulfillment

RYT-200 By Caroline Muggia
RYT-200
Caroline Muggia is a writer and environmental advocate with a B.A. in Environmental Studies & Psychology from Middlebury College.

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When we look for happiness outside of ourselves in the form of material items or others to bring us joy, it feels like we can never get there. Marc and Angel Chernoff, the authors of the new book 1000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently, believe achieving happiness has more to do with our inner states—how we feel about ourselves, the thoughts we feed, and our passions. In this excerpt from their new book, they share 8 things we need to give up to step into greater happiness and fulfillment. Why not start today?

Millions of people live their entire lives on default settings, never realizing they can customize everything. Don't be one of them. Don't settle for the default settings in life. Dare to make edits and improvements. Dare to make your personal growth a top priority. The truth is, you won't always be a priority to others, and that's why you need to be a priority to yourself. Learn to respect yourself, take care of yourself, and become your own support system. Your needs matter. If you want to move on to better things, you have to give up what's weighing you down—which is not always as obvious and easy as it sounds. Starting today, give up...

1. Letting the opinions of others control your life.

In the end, it's not what others think, it's what you think about yourself that counts. Sometimes you have to do exactly what's best for you and your life, not what's best for everyone else.

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2. The shame of past failures.

Your past does not equal your future. Just because you failed yesterday, or today, or for the last six months, or the last 16 years, doesn't have any impact on the current moment. All that matters is what you do right now.

3. Being indecisive about what you want.

When you're passionate, you're energized. Likewise, when you lack passion, your energy is low and unproductive. Make a decision to figure out what you want, and then pursue it passionately.

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4. Procrastinating on the goals that matter to you.

We have two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. When there is love and inspiration, you can't go wrong. A year from now, you will wish you had started today.

5. Choosing to do nothing.

Every day is a new chance to choose. Choose to shift your perspective. Choose to turn on the light and stop fretting about insecurity and doubt. Choose to do work that you are proud of. Choose to truly live, right now.

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6. Your need to be right.

Aim for success, but never give up your right to be wrong. Because when you do, you will also lose your ability to learn new things and move forward with your life.

7. Running from problems that should be fixed.

We make life harder than it has to be. The difficulties started when conversations became texting, feelings became subliminal, sex became a game, the word "love" fell out of context, trust faded as honesty waned, jealously became a habit, being hurt started to feel natural, and running away from it all became our solution. Face these issues, fix the problems, communicate, appreciate, forgive, and love the people in your life who deserve it.

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8. Making excuses rather than decisions.

Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem-solving. A mistake doesn't become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions.

Based on excerpts from 1000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently by Marc and Angel Chernoff with the permission of Tarcher Perigee, a division of Penguin Random House. Copyright © 2019.

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