How Fear Is Holding You Back + 4 Ways To Overcome It
You've heard the saying, "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid!" It's true. But that doesn't mean that trying to discern your next big move or asking questions about your path won't still be an emotional roller coaster. The scintillating promise of a brighter, bolder existence and the exhilarating taste of freedom are mingled with the paralyzing, nerve-wracking fear that you may not make it, that the net won’t appear, and you’ll end up in a worse place than where you started.
Fear can undermine us in two ways: It will either prevent us from taking bold action in the first place, keeping us caught in a cycle of anxiety, or it will send us doubt after doubt once we've made the leap. That can lead us to feel overwhelmed and sap the energy and devotion that continuing down this new path requires.
That is not to say nerves stemming from uncertainty aren't a natural part of approaching a big change. Simply by venturing outside your comfort zone and into the unknown, you're making yourself vulnerable to uncertainty. And that anxiety can keep you from making the breakthrough your heart’s been calling for—but it doesn't have to.
Here's how to prepare yourself to make that leap and succeed on your new path once you do.
1. Set a clear, concrete vision.
To leap well and wisely, to anchor the transformation you truly want, you must set a crystal clear vision for what you’re moving toward, what you’re calling in, what your soul is singing for. By defining the desire propelling you to make a change, you tell the universe what it is you’re after, giving it more to work with and reinforcing the mindset that you’re open and worthy of receiving what you want.
You don’t need to know the specifics of the end result—your new partner’s eye color, your new job title, etc. You just need to know how you want to feel about the new thing you’re calling in. A clear vision helps you more skillfully chart your course.
2. Investigate what you're trying to move away from.
Approaching change with the motivation of feeling trapped is one of the biggest barriers to actually getting the transformation you seek.
Focusing on what isn't working for you right now—"I hate my job," "I’m so sick of my relationship," "I can’t stand doing five hours of yard work every weekend for this stupid house"—keeps you in the energetic field of dissatisfaction and exhaustion. While it is important to be aware of life circumstances that feel misaligned with your true self, it’s essential to ask yourself why you really feel that way. Those things may just be symptoms of a greater issue.
Do you really hate your job? Or do you feel frustrated because you don’t feel challenged, seen, or creatively expressed as an integral part of a team, which is what you really want?
Are you really sick of your relationship? Or are you sad and exhausted from feeling like you can’t communicate with the person you’re supposed to be closest with, and that intimacy is what you crave more than anything?
Do you really hate your house? Or do you desire more support (and maybe wish you were better at asking for support)?
You get my drift. Knowing the underlying reasons you feel discontent with your present situation is life-changing. It's the only way to empower yourself to avoid repeating the same patterns.
3. Learn to relish uncertainty.
If you can transform the fear that arises from uncertainty into a perspective of curiosity, wonder, and creative participation, you'll begin to see the unknown as a place of possibility. Who knows what magic is waiting for you, where your inspired action will lead you, or what insights will happen as a result? When you learn to savor the unfamiliarity of leaving your comfort zone, you align yourself with openness, which is where all magic and synchronicity happens.
If you’re trying to control the future, you'll actually inhibit the natural flow of things. Turn your energy away from fear and begin to pay attention to the connections and opportunities that present themselves to you.
4. Surrender and trust.
Choose again and again to surrender your trust to the universe, knowing that everything will work out. If you've gotten really clear on what you desire and embraced uncertainty, the universe will look after you. Keep showing up. Trust the ebbs and flows. Keep calling on the support you need. Devoting your trust over and over again to yourself and the universe will keep you centered, anchored, and guided on your path.
Want more insights on how to level up your life? Check out your July horoscope, then find out why holding on to past relationships is the worst thing you can do for yourself.