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On New Year’s Eve, my boyfriend of four years proposed. I screamed. We cried. I did a happy dance. Let’s just say I’m super happy it didn’t happen in a public place. But 20 minutes later, the “wedding ball” started rolling. “Have you set a date?” “What city are you thinking?” “Who's in your bridal party?” It was thrilling, yet extremely overwhelming, and for days I couldn’t take the smile off of my face.
But I had a carousel of questions circling my head. I felt like I needed to figure it all out on the first day.
I've always said that I wanted a long engagement. Saying you want to be engaged a year to a year and a half sounds like a lifetime when you aren't engaged. Now, it sounds like a tight schedule. There’s venues, dresses, bridesmaids, cakes, flights, churches, music, food, insurance, fire marshals, planners, budgets, and flowers... and I’m just standing here like, “huh?”
Luckily, this is all coming at a time when I'm feeling, or starting to feel, very secure in who I am as a person. Yoga has done that for me. Yoga has given me the ability to see life as a series of postures. There are times to build heat, and times to cool down. There are even times when your world needs to be flipped upside down to change your perspective, and there's also a time to cry in Warrior 2, because even though the moment is painful and awful, it’s only a moment. I can do anything for a moment. Everything you use on the mat, you can use in life, and you can definitely use in wedding planning.
We hit a point where we wanted to elope. We hit a point where we couldn’t even say the “W” word. We were exhausted by the to-do list and the peanut gallery. Then I finally realized that we need to go posture by posture. We laid out the blueprint. We started looking into places, and surrounding ourselves with positive energy. There are flaws in everything, but the focus switched from perfection to happiness. I became more drawn to people and places that were going to make this a cohesively happy project, rather than an episode of Bridezilla. And slowly it’s falling into place.
No, I haven’t picked out invitations or napkins. And we don’t have a date set. But I’ll get there. I’m warming up the component parts, and when the journey gets to its peak (the wedding day), I’ll be prepared for it. I will take in the cooling-down process after, and make it just as important as the warmup. Then I'll remind myself to not leave out Savasana.
The major moments in life, like an engagement or a wedding, come to challenge us. They push us to the next level of life. They force us to draw lines in the sand, speak up, look at ourselves, and define our priorities. But if we can remember that it’s part of a sequence, it becomes a lot less overwhelming and a whole lot more enjoyable.