My mother had a way of looking into my eyes when I was a child that conveyed a deep and all-encompassing love. As a result, the first nine years of my life were a carefree adventure of being treated like a princess. My days were filled with endless attention, toys, and extravagant birthday parties — my own personal Disneyland. At the time, I was shielded from the many unpleasant realities going on in my mother’s marriage, life, and body. It's amazing how she still made my life so wonderful in spite of her own situation. I didn’t know she was ill, so it was a shock when she passed away when I was just ten years old.
Disneyland ended that day.
There were no more carefree days, beautiful birthday parties, or being treated like a princess, as my dad was the opposite of my mom.
However, I not only survived this experience, but have thrived while learning a lot about compassion, understanding, and love through my own suffering. As a result, I am able to help others as well.
I believe my mother has never left my side, and though she hasn't been here in physical form, she has helped me navigate my life when I paid attention to her through my intuition, feelings, and instincts.
She has brought many mentors who just “magically” showed up in my life, and guided me on the path of personal growth, which has led to a beautiful life today.
It took me years to learn the following important life lessons:
1. We need to develop a good relationship with ourselves before we can have one with someone else. Instead of always looking outside ourselves for love, acceptance, and caring, we have to look within.
2. Anything is possible through the eyes of love, and self-love is the most powerful force in the Universe. Looking through our own eyes with gratitude and appreciation for the wonderful person we are can be solve much of what ails us.
3. Learning to love ourselves attracts the people, places, and things we need to thrive and give us the power to help others on the path to personal growth as well. Our experiences become a gift for other weary travelers who are looking for the light of hope.
4. Our healing helps us shine brightly and show others that whatever they have gone through, they can still have a beautiful life too. We empower others by our example, and what we've gone through can benefit the world if we use it for transformation and not for self-recrimination or despair.
5. Blaming is a waste of our time, whereas taking responsibility for our own choices, thoughts, feelings, behavior, and beliefs is very empowering.
6. Gratitude and quieting our mind with meditation allows us to get centered and live more peacefully, no matter what is going on around us.
7. Forgiveness is the magic elixir for most every kind of negative feeling we could have. Forgiving ourselves and those around us for not being the people we want them to be sets us free. It doesn’t mean reconciliation or having to be around abusive people, but forgiving them inside our own heart.
All of my experiences and knowledge have aligned with my purpose, which is to coach others and write about health and wellness of the mind, body, and spirit.
Even though I wish I could physically see and hug my mother, I feel grateful to have found a way to use my experiences in positive ways by extending the healing love and understanding she gave to me.
I have a husband today who was brought to me through some amazing and seemingly coincidental ways. We believe it was my mom who orchestrated the process of our meeting.
In addition to her guiding us together, my husband has a way of looking into my eyes that conveys a deep and all-encompassing love, just as my mother did when she was alive.