How To Deal With Valentine’s Day After a Recent Break Up

Written by Lesley Knowles

So, it’s a few days before Valentine’s Day but you just broke up with your significant other. Getting through a break up can be pretty hard. How much worse can it get when you suddenly become “loveless” as the day of hearts approaches?

You might be desperately wondering what to do or how to feel on that supposedly full-of-love day. Here are some ideas.

1. Avoid all communication with your ex. 

Connecting with your ex just because it’s Valentine’s Day is verging of desperate behavior. If you're both 100% done, resist the temptation. De-friend your ex on Facebook and turn off your phone if that helps.

Knowing what your ex is doing or who he or she’s with on Valentine’s Day will not do you any good. It will not make you feel better, in fact it will make you feel worse.

2. Plan a fun night with single friends.

If you really want to go out on Valentine’s Day, do so with friends. Throw a singles party. Have a pool party, slumber party, or go bowling. Have a movie marathon. Play games. Try good-things-about-being-single game. (Name as many as you can!)

But avoid gathering at any place where you can “smell” the scent of romance. Avoid restaurants where couples typically go for a date. Just have fun with those who understand you.

3. Express your love to others.

Valentine’s Day is not just for romantic love! So why not show your love and compassion to, let’s say three people. Do something extra nice for them that day. Drop by your neighbor who is recently widowed or elderly and give a simple Valentine’s Day gift, maybe a basket of goodies or a bouquet of flowers. Babysit a couple’s child while they go on a date, or you set up a nice, romantic dinner for your mom and dad or grandma or grandpa.

4. Make Valentine’s Day a “love-me” day.

Do the things that make you happy. Treat yourself with your favorite dessert or try something you've never tasted before. Buy something for yourself: a book, DVD, or a simple-something you've wanted for a long time. Watch a movie (but avoid a romantic comedy). Treat yourself to a nice spa and get a full-body massage, or get a new haircut.

5. Love and embrace the day.

You can be bitter because of the break up, but try not to hate the day. You can cry, get angry, or feel lonely, and that’s OK. But do the mourning before Valentine’s Day. Find another meaning for Valentine’s Day. Know that there are so many people who love you.

Give and receive love from your family, friends, and even to other people you are not really acquainted with. The world is full of different kinds of love, not just romantic love.

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