How to Deal With People Who Suck Your Energy

When’s the last time you felt alive? As in: heart open, every-cell-in-your-body-doing-a-happy-dance, laughing-uncontrollably-for-no-reason alive?

Here’s the thing. We all have the opportunity RIGHT NOW to feel that way. To feel completely, totally, utterly, unapologetically, alive.

Last time I checked, being alive wasn’t just about breathing and taking up space. Being alive meant that you were living life the way you were intended to experience it, to the fullest.

So what’s stopping us from living that way?

It's the bullshit. The drama. The “stress.” Activities that are boring, unfulfilling, and a pain in the ass. People who drain us.

Take a look back at the past year. How many people did you come across who sucked your energy dry?

How did you spend your time? Was it spent putting out fires, or getting caught up in petty drama that started to feel icky? Did you spend time defending yourself, your choices, your dreams, and barely bobbing afloat to just make it through the day?

Since the quality of our life is a direct reflection of the quality of our relationships, let’s take a look at ways you can gracefully deal with people who suck our energy dry:

1. Have a conversation with them about what shows up for you when you are in their presence.

The key here is to make it about YOU. It’s easy to blame another person as the cause of your pain and suffering. But the real deal is, YOU have the issue with them.

That person is in your life for a reason. We typically attract the people in our lives. They're a reflection of how we feel. And, more often than not, that person remain in your life because you didn’t own up to how you really felt in his or her presence, so you allowed it to persist.

Own it.

2. Do your thing.

Listen, no one is holding a gun to your head saying that you have to hang out with certain people.

Whether it be family or friends, you have a choice about how you spend your time. Of course, there is a growing opportunity for you when you can be in the presence of someone who you perceive to suck your energy dry yet you can still be chillaxed.

However, until you get to that point in your life, put yourself first. Honor yourself and your boundaries. When you practice doing that enough times, your resentment towards others will lessen and you will be able to be in the presence of people who may normally rock your boat.

3. Love them anyway.

Hey, the evolved way of being is to love em’ anyway. When you can see clearly that the person who is sucking your energy dry is merely looking for attention, or unhappy, it’s much easier to have compassion and love them instead of rejecting them. And, it’ll give you way more points in the karma department.


You are too precious to live a life of simply surviving. The mere fact that you have been born is the greatest gift. Will you cherish it or squander it?

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