How to Find Your Sweet Spot

Written by Timothi Jane Graham

What do you love to do? So many of us answer this question without missing a beat. But when asked if that thing is putting food on the table we may get defensive and try to change the subject. The truth is alot of us are chained to gigs we don't love doing. But day after day we drag our butts in there, put in the time and when we're not recovering maybe we serve ourselves a tiny portion of what really lights our fire.

But I promise you, that's not how it needs to be. We all dream of following our passions. Of doing less and having more. Of breaking free and doing that thing that rocks our world. Of finding that one talent that is uniquely ours. That makes us feel truly alive and running with it. That thing is called our sweet spot and we all have one. Our sweet spot needs to be excavated. It needs to be cultivated and nurtured. And once we identify it and synch up with it, there ain't no stoppin' us.

I grew up in a family of crazy ass performers. From an early age I was groomed for the stage. When I was 6 I was in my first off Broadway show and by 13 I was dancing at Lincoln Center. I performed over all mediums throughout my life and made a damn good living at it. Even though, I felt tremendous stress every time I stepped on the stage or infront of a camera, there was never a question of what I was supposed to do. It was in my blood. or so I thought.

When my father passed away, I had a life changing realization. I didn't want to perform at all. I called up my agents and quit on the spot. I had never felt so clear. I had never felt so free. It was at this point that I realized I didn't know who I was or what I wanted. I began to explore. After 2 years of trying everything under the sun I started to freak. Nothing was sticking.

Then I signed up for a photography class. It was love at first click. It was the first time I connected with something so fully that I lost all sense of time. Very quickly people began asking me to take their picture for money. I began to travel the world for my work and that led me to my second unknown love, globe trotting and leading journeys to amazing places. Things were flowing to me effortlessly. I was in the zone. I had found my sweet spot. I now live my dream doing something I never knew I could do much less something I truly love.

We all have the potential to create whatever reality we like. Here are some steps you can take right now to find your sweet spot and follow your dreams:

  • Take a Poll: Connect with 15-20 people who really know you and ask them what they feel your unique talents are. What do they get from you that they don't get from anyone else. What do they count on you for. See what these observations have in common. These observations are the beginnings of your road map.
  • Discover Your Strengths: There is an amazing book out there called Now, Discover Your Strengths. It includes a test based on years of research to identify the strongest synapse connections your brain has made. By the time we are 2 we have made about 15,000 connections. The dominate ones prevail while about 10,000 drop off by our mid teens. The strongest ones are the connections that are thriving. These strengths are your tool box. Find them and make friends with them.
  • Explore: Using the above information begin to explore. Read voraciously, take classes, fly to Timbuktu. Leave no stone unturned. Sometimes you will find true love in the most overlooked places.
  • Abstain From Media: Unplug from TV and minimize your internet time. A cluttered brain is not a clear brain. Stepping back to get clarity is muy importante during this process. You want to remain as open as possible. So turn off the screens and kick it ol' school.
  • Visualize: Once you have found your sweet spot, now is the time to piece together its details. Meditation using visualizations, journals and vision boards are powerful tools to building what you want. Get specific. What does it feel like, look like, taste like.
  • Get Good: You found your spark, you've gotten clear. Now, go work your butt off and get GOOD. If it's truly your sweet spot it won't feel like work at all.

We all are different and no two paths our the same. But we all have the right to live as fully as possible and follow our dreams and passions. Nothing is set in stone and you can reinvent yourself anytime you want. Trust me. I've done it. So go on... dig deep, excavate your sweet spot and set the world on fire!!

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