600 years ago Leonardo Da Vinci used mathematic proportions to paint and create a perfect face but what he couldn't give his paintings was self-esteem or self-worth. When you begin to really love your true self and feel confident about the new choices you are making your self-perception is affected. 

I always thought and would tell people that the essence of beauty was fully linked to inner beauty, but now after many different experiences I have discovered it is a combination of everything you do. Health, inner, outer beauty and especially your environment help you to perceive your self worth. If you are in an environment that makes you feel sloppy or out of control, or a relationship that makes you feel unworthy and far from loved, or a job that doesn’t consider your self worth, and its just a pay check, you will lack the confidence from within to change and love yourself fully.

They say that if you aren’t good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you’ll resent the time and energy you give another person that you are not even giving to yourself. I feel this statement pretty much sums up a decade of my life. For ten plus years I fought to figure out who I was, I hid behind societal rules, family pressure, and mentally hindering relationships. I changed jobs frequently, I never valued my self worth, I gave and wasn’t given, and most of all I was complacent. I tried to change the people I dated, and it seemed as if I was dating the same person, just with a different face. I latched on to others dreams, because I was never able to formulate my own due to fear. I pushed men away when they go to close. In short I was a serial monogamist with a short attention span. I claimed I wanted a partner in crime, someone to drive me home from the airport, cheer me on when I succeed, hold my hair when I vomit, but I ended numerous relationships when the thought of marriage arose, till death do us part? I would have been nothing more then a fraud, a pretend grown up, a con artist playing the role of bride. I couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life with myself, how do you explain to someone you love that you can’t give yourself to them because if you did, your not sure who you would be giving? You can’t tell someone that, especially someone you love, so I never did, instead I ran.

My life changed when I decided I had enough, put the fear aside, the disappointment of others to bed, and decided to only worry about the single most important person, myself. I had to learn to love myself first. People have these expectations of us, family especially. I have figured out that we can live our entire lives trying to please other people, meanwhile not only will you never really please them, but at the end of the line, you will look back and you will have missed everything. Everything that is truly important anyway.

Through experience and engaging in activities you may have never thought possible you will learn your value and worth. What is more important is how you parlay that into your daily life and here are a few tips to follow to help you increase your self-worth: Learn to embrace these principles daily and cultivate the happiness you deserve:
1. Not settling for less then what you know you deserve in your relationships
2. Asking for what you want and need from others
3. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension
4. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values
5. Make choices based on what YOU believe, and not what others believe
It truly is that easy. When you finally make the decision to love yourself first you will start to cultivate things that stick.  You will also notice everything that doesn’t fit inside your true values will disappear as quickly they come.

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