Hips do not lie. They scream at us on the mat, and yet we do everything possible to avoid listening. The Sacral chakra holds our relationship issues, creativity, and sensuality. Tightness in the low back and hips, reproductive disorders, are all connected to repressing emotions around relationships. If we, or our partner, feel unloved when expressing anger, sadness, or anxiety, the emotions are typically repressed. When emotions are repressed, the body shuts off oxygen to muscles, which causes a pain reaction. Repressed long enough, the pain becomes chronic and the energy evolves into disease and disorders.
Just as we aim to create space in our hips during yoga, can we create a space where our partner still feels loved when either their authentic self or shadow side emerge into the light? We all have a tendency to hold both of these sides back when we meet someone new with whom we are romantically interested. This is problematic because eventually, both sides will emerge. Then what?
Yet, there is something within all of us that wants to be broken open and unleashed, vulnerable and responsive, tender and powerful at the same time. It is as if all of the cosmos exist within us, but are only being viewed through a cheap, limited toy telescope. Can you stay with your partner when the authenticity and shadows appear and not try to change or fix him/her? By staying present, learning, getting to know the richness of depth, you take your partner deeper than they can go alone.
While most people are amazingly resourceful, we get stuck. We need the energy of another to help take us deeper. Are you up for that challenge? Are you willing to listen with more than your ears? Going deeper in a relationship is about listening to our body speak and react, watching our internal expression, feeling the breath, and using it all as a guide. Our bodies speak in a multitude of ways and if you are not attentive, so much information is lost.
Now is time to go to a deeper level or begin the process of resolution and closure to the relationship. There is no more room for half-way relationships. These are destroying us as humans as we settle for “good enough” (but not great) and die slowly, longing for more. Listen to what your hips are telling you. You may find that as you apply the hip opening practice from the mat to your relationships, you heal more than the relationship.