A Feng Shui Expert's Recipe For Painless Decluttering

I used to deal with this myself. A few years ago, I have moved at least seven times over a decade, either temporarily or more "permanently," and each move was met with debilitating anxiety. Given the fact that I did not have a moving system and had had bad experiences with moving in the past, the stress increased each time. By the time the last move came around, I was a mess, and I knew something had to change.

I then realized that reducing the amount of stuff I owned was the secret to an easier life. Here is the practice that helped me achieve this minimalism. Speaking as a feng shui practitioner who was actually disorganized once upon a time, I can say that it really works.

Start strong by filling up a trash bag with items to donate. If you keep thinking about an item you packed the next day, go get it. The rest should go to a donation bank the day after. You can also ask your friends if they want to go through your donated clothes bag, but they shouldn't delay more than two to three days, otherwise you will not experience the immediate benefits of decluttering, and you might get cold feet.

The next time you sit at the dining table to eat breakfast, just look around. If you see something that is either out of place, that you bought "because it was on sale," or that you own because someone gave it to you but you don't really like it, it's time to question whether you still want it. If the answer to this question is no, the item should go in a donation bag. Repeat in every room.

All of us unintentionally hold on to bad memories. For example, you have a photo on the wall of your graduation day with your grandmother whom you adore. But every time you look at it, you remember that your mom couldn't make it that day because of poor planning on her part. Do not keep that photo! Even if your grandmother is a positive person in your life, you do not have to relive that painful day each time you spend time in your living room. We become our thoughts, so let's pay attention to bad ones associated with the objects that surround us.

Nagging objects, photos, and furniture should be removed. Think about that exercise bike in your living room that you rarely use, that huge toolbox in your kitchen cabinet that your dad got you so you could become handy, that pressure cooker that takes up all your counter space but never gets turned on. Ask yourself what these objects say to you. If you're not using them, they might subtly convey that you are in less-than-excellent shape, that you will never please your dad or be handy like him, that you will never be able to make holiday meals like your mom—you get the picture. We don't need more nagging in our lives.

Make it a communal family activity. Are your kids' art and toys taking up a ton of space? Help them determine what they truly love and what they don't by placing everything in the middle of their room and helping them land on their favorite possessions. I recently did this that with my 3-year-old son, assuming at first that it would just make him upset. I was surprised to find out that he was happy to have thrown away half of his toys! They were gifts for the most part that he wasn't taking to or toys he had outgrown. He said that "the mess" was always keeping him from finding the ones he truly liked. Wow!

Objects should be used, or their energy becomes unnecessary weight on your energy. For example, if you have a bag of old pregnancy clothes and you know of a pregnant woman who needs them, lend them to her. If you know you want to be pregnant again, ask the person to give the clothes back. Belongings should be in use, or they should not be in your home. Same goes for sports gear, kids' toys, instruments, etc.

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