One of the most frustrating feelings we experience is helplessness. Deep trauma is often a direct result of being trapped in an unhealthy situation over which you have control—being beaten, raped, being held at gunpoint, facing combat, and so on. For most of us, these are not the kinds of trauma we're likely to face often—or even ever.
Regardless of the intensity or length of the traumatic situation, feeling helpless to change the way someone treats themselves or how they treat you is always painful.
What do you do when someone you care about is treating themselves poorly—drinking too much, taking drugs, putting themselves in harmful situations, eating badly, acting out with irrational behavior, putting themselves down, or isolating themselves?
To avoid feeling helpless about how this person treats themselves, do you try to control them by doing any of the following?