How Reconnecting With Friends Can Change Your Life

How Reconnecting With Friends Can Change Your Life Hero Image
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I may be late to the party, but I'm reading Elizabeth Gilbert's Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, and she says something potent. "Ideas have no ma­teri­al body, but they do have consciousness, and they most certainly have will." It got me contemplating about reconnecting with people I haven't seen in a while, and the act of thinking about someone and how that goes out into the universe. It also got me thinking about the impulse to take stock. Which can happen after anything. Anything at all. Even an alchemic sentence in a book. Those are the best, aren’t they?

What makes you want to re-establish a connection? Is it a nagging sense that builds over time until it's impossible to ignore or a life-changing event that irrevocably alters your perspective? Or maybe it's just a sunset walk along the Hudson River when you catch sight of twinkling lights on the other side of the river and, boom, life feels palpably candescent. As impulsively and naively as these ideas can start when they appear seemingly unannounced, they may need a little coaxing. I guess I'll just follow Pythagoras on that: "Choose always the way that seems best."

Try it out, though? The charm and the challenge of starting out with no certainty about where you're going to end up with your actions. It reminds me of what Hemingway said when speaking about his writing routine, "When you stop you are as empty, and at the same time never empty but filling, as when you have made love to someone you love. Nothing can hurt you, nothing can happen, nothing means anything until the next day when you do it again. It is the wait until the next day that is hard to get through." I quite enjoy the waiting, and as the Greek philosopher said, "Custom will soon render it easy and agreeable."

Central to this idea is the focus on the ways that such decisions are mediated by social and cultural factors that influence our norms and expectations, as well as the things that we value, the things we take for granted, and ultimately, the kinds of connections that we aspire to lead.

I hope my words and thoughts lead to some reconnection, because prodding and pushing forward affects everything. As Gilbert alluded to, something as intangible and spontaneous as an idea, any idea (and for me it just happened to be reconnecting), could have its own universal ebb and flow. Ain't life grand?


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