It all started one fateful day in 1996. I’d stayed home sick from school, and at some point in the afternoon, I heard a knock at the door. I opened it and to my surprise found myself face-to-face with the boy I had a crush on. I soon found out that he had been sent there by my “best friend” to tell me that he liked her and not me.
“Don’t be mad at her,” he told me. “I never would have dated you anyway.” As anyone who’s been through high school can imagine, I almost died of embarrassment—wanted to melt into a puddle. I have no memory of how I reacted in the moments and days later. What I do remember is the meaning I attached to the experience and carried as baggage through every adventure I took for the next 20 years.
That story, as I told it to myself, meant that I was broken, unlovable, ugly, and fat. Interestingly, this guy didn’t say anything like that to me…I made that all up myself.
Fast-forward 20 years (and a lot of internal work): I am now a life coach focused on helping women learn to love their bodies and live full lives now (rather than 15 pounds from now).
How did I make the transition from body shame to self-love? And how can you do the same? The following four steps are a beautiful place to start: