How To Control Your Spending & Still Live Abundantly
You may be struggling to live abundantly for two reasons:
- You're afraid to spend too much money for fear that there won't be enough in the future.
- You spend too much money and bury your head in the sand.
So can you find a middle ground? How do you live abundantly without falling prey to the fear of scarcity or ignoring your fears and living beyond your means?
Here are three steps to learn to be mindful of your spending and still live extremely abundantly:
1. Take your spending from unconscious to conscious.
Think about your last big purchase. Did any part of you want to make such a big purchase to prove something? (Note that this can be totally unconscious!). Did you aim to show others that you're worthy of attention, approval, and love through acquiring material possessions? Did any part of you want to use spending money as a way of distracting from something else? The phrase "retail therapy" exists for a reason, and there are many different ways of using spending as an emotional crutch.
Spending a lot in order to have nice things around you doesn't necessarily mean you are living abundantly, however. To live abundantly, it's important to tell yourself the truth about your spending without judgment — and with lots of compassion.
For example: I'm spending because a part of me is scared that if I don't buy nice material possessions, I may be rejected, criticized or judged. Or: I'm spending because I want to forget about something else that is causing me pain and stress.
When you tell yourself the truth about your spending decisions, you can interrupt patterns of spending that keep you stuck in a cycle of lack (as opposed to abundance), and instead choose to spend from a place of conscious awareness.
Spending from a place of conscious awareness means that you know exactly why you're spending and have consciously decided to meet yourself where you are or create a new pattern.
2. Investigate your attachment to spending.
Have you ever felt like if you don't have that car, outfit, or gadget, your life won't be complete?
If so, attachment is keeping you from experiencing the everyday abundance of your life and repelling your manifestations of an ever greater, richer, deeper feeling of abundance.
I had a friend in high school who had a crush. And so she tried her hardest to make him like her. She dressed in clothes she thought he would like. She texted him frequently to check in. She tried to hang out with him as much as possible to show him how cool, sexy, and intelligent she was. The truth is, she was a great, smart and interesting person. But she was hiding her true self by straining to impress the guy she liked. So do you think she "got" him in the end?
Nope. Her gestures did not ultimately attract him to her organically. Her overabundance of effort led to a lack of abundance (in terms of love).
There is a similar dynamic at play when it comes to living abundantly: when you are so hellbent on having that new BMW or in-ground pool and can't imagine your life without it, it repels abundance instead of attracting it.
In short, attachment repels abundance. Non-attachment attracts abundance. It's like the unspoken rules of dating. Play it cool. Be present.
So investigate the parts of you that feel you need specific material possessions to live abundantly. Find out the fear behind your attachment and experiment with healing the fear instead of spending money out of desperation.
3. Open yourself up to allow resources to show themselves.
Believing that you have to earn and spend a lot of money to live abundantly is like believing that you can only make it from New York to Los Angeles by walking.
Spending money is only one of an unlimited amount of vehicles to live abundantly. When you rely solely on money to be your source of abundance, you ignore all of the other possibilities to experience your inherent right to abundance.
For an example, I wanted to move to San Diego and I didn't have enough money to make the move. I waited for a long time and forced myself to work really hard to save up enough money. While I was so hellbent on earning enough money to move to San Diego, I declined an invitation to live in a multi-million-dollar condo on the beach in San Diego because I wasn't paying for it. I was so focused on making money to pay for a new house in San Diego that I completely ignored an opportunity to live on the beach for free!
When I opened up and allowed myself to see other resources the Universe was giving me to live in San Diego, I realized that spending money had nothing to do with living abundantly. I just had to open myself up to receive abundance in any form it presented itself.
If you're ready to spend from a place of abundance, check out this free training on healing money blocks and attracting more abundance.