One of the most important lessons I've learned about relationships is this: how you think and feel about yourself determines how others think and feel about you, too.
I always knew this, but I didn't realize how true it was until I saw it unfold in my own life. Because of this, I'd like to share my story with you, about how I called in a man who makes me feel more alive than any man ever has before. My hope is that you can use these lessons to find a partner who treats you magnificently, too.
In the Fall of 2013, I went through a very difficult time. A breakup and a painful family situation had left me feeling raw and devastated. I knew that in order to pull myself out of it, I had to spend most of my time rebuilding the love within myself. So that's what I did.
I spent the end of 2013 meditating, reading inspirational books, doing yoga, listening to my spiritual teachers, and connecting with my heart. And ... it worked. By mid-January, I was feeling whole again.
During this time, I was reading a fabulous book by Sally Kempton called Awakening Shakti — an incredible portrayal of the Hindu goddesses that guides women to experience the divine feminine within ourselves.
In this book, there was one goddess who I loved the most. I felt an affinity for her right away; not only because I wanted to be her, but also because I could identify parts of myself that were her. Her name is Lalita Tripura Sundari, and she is the goddess of erotic spirituality.
As Sally describes, Lalita is "the goddess who most successfully holds together the apparent opposites of executive power and sexuality, of sexual and spiritual love. Queenly and playful, she represents the most delicious form of the integrated feminine."
"Yes!" I thought as I read her description. Just yes.
Reading about Lalita helped me identify who I wanted to be in the world as a woman; she represented so many qualities that I wanted for myself. She made them real and accessible; I could feel the goddess within me start to awaken even more.
Every day I would meditate into a heart-centered place, and evoke the feeling of the goddess.
I am powerful.
I am playful.
I am sensual.
I am attractive.
I am love.
As I did this, I began to feel more and more like myself! I felt great inside! I felt like the real me. Little did I know, I was also preparing to meet a man who would see me as these qualities, too.
In the midst of my goddess-vibe, I went to a Valentine's Day party with a friend. The theme felt incredibly fitting. Love. Of course. Why would we celebrate anything else?
The fact that I was single at this party didn't matter to me. I felt connected to the great love in my heart, and therefore I felt it everywhere. I was happy and fulfilled just being me.
I'm sure you can guess what happened at this party. I wasn't expecting it, but looking back, it makes perfect sense. I met a man who saw me as the goddess that I knew I was.
He noticed me from across the room and walked toward me, in a straight line, through the crowd.
Outright he said, "Hi. Who are you?" taking my hand, "Is this OK? You're beautiful." He was playful and respectful. I liked his energy, and the way he made me feel.
The most incredible thing about our interaction was that I knew this man saw me as I saw me — a powerful, playful, attractive woman, with grace, humility, and love in her heart.
So that's where our story began, and it has continued from there. Several months since our first meeting, my connection to this man has remained as extraordinary as it was the first night I met him. It's truly been one of the most beautiful experiences of my life.
After this happened to me, I deeply understood the truth behind all relationships: People will treat you how you treat yourself. They will see you how you see yourself.
When I experienced myself as the goddess, this is who I became. How I felt about myself was mirrored back to me by this man. I felt supremely loved, and it all started within me.
Knowing this powerful truth, it's your turn. Who do you want to be, and how do you want to be seen?
Search deep within. Find the love, beauty, power, and grace within yourself. Own these qualities, and let them shine through you.
Once you claim who you really are, you absolutely will find a partner who claims you as this magnificent person, too.
Please leave a comment below telling us how you're going to be more of the person you want to be, starting today.
And if you want my help to become the person you want to be, preparing you for the greatest love of your life, please click here.