Growing up, I prepared to find my soul mate by creating a list of all the things I wanted in a partner. My list included: curly hair, makes me laugh, taller than I am, and able to provide for me and my six children. (Keep in mind this was a list I created when I was six years old!)
As I got older, the list was constantly changing ... and so was I. One updated list included: college educated, able to fight off bad guys, and believes in God.
But for some reason, I was having no luck meeting my soul mate. I remember dating guys and realizing that their favorite songs, drinks, and sports teams suddenly became my favorite. When we broke up, I was utterly devastated because everything I did and enjoyed reminded me of them.
Every time I found myself broken-hearted, I blamed myself for not sticking to my "soul mate list."
But was that really the problem?
How is it even possible to follow a list that is constantly changing?
You can't! And that's why I wasn't finding my soul mate. I was focusing too much on my expectations of the other person instead of focusing on what I wanted in myself.
Although this universal secret took me a very long time to discover, it worked almost instantly the moment I put it to the test.
The secret to finding and keeping your soul mate is to find (and keep) yourself first!
What often happens when we start dating someone is that we're so filled with excitement that this person could potentially be The One. We get so enamored with our hopeful feelings that we forget our identities, our securities, (and our list) completely.
But when you come to terms with who you are, what you like, and what’s important to you, then dating and finding your ideal soul mate becomes much easier. Finding and loving yourself makes it easier to find the soul mate who will love you, too.
Those of you looking for love, be aware of this secret and live by it! Instead of making a list of what you want in a soul mate, make a list instead of the person you dream to become! This way, you are always moving in a better direction.
Trust me, it’s hard to pass up someone who is confident, secure, and happy. It may take some time to discover who you are, what you like, and what makes you most happy (and that’s OK). Finding myself gave me the comfort I needed to not only find (and keep) my true soul mate, but it also gave me the confidence and stability I needed to find (and keep) my dream life!
I have fully accepted myself as a spaghetti-eating, Disney movie-watching, biking, plant-loving, confident woman of God … and my husband embraces every part of me.