Have you recently (or not so recently) had a colossal mess-up, and each time you reflect on it, shame floods every cell in your body?
Yeah. That was me.
I messed up big time.
I should have known better.
I thought I did know better.
I found myself asking: Aren't I too old for this? Can I really eff up like this?
Apparently so. Because I did.
Diminished integrity makes for sleepless nights, which for me adds up to a whole lot of yuck.
I got into this mess because I doubted myself ... abandoned myself. Essentially, I gave my power away and I needed to stop the hemorrhaging.
I knew one gem for sure: I am in charge of how I feel and I needed to feel bad about this.This was my chance to get the lesson. To really get this one so I would never have to repeat it again.
Do better, I repeated to myself.
Getting gritty and humble all in one breath became necessary.
This incident was unacceptable and doing better, the only option.
Life is messy.
One part spills over and mashes into another.
Never stagnant, ever shifting, interconnected and paradoxical.
Rendering the whole bit slightly out of our hands.
But THIS? This I decided to get all warrior on.
Committed to integrity refining and tackling piles of emotional clutter, making an evolutionary leap in consciousness.
I won't always hit the bull's-eye. After all, to err is human .... But I can come damn close.
And so can you.
We can play bigger; go deeper; shine brighter.
We can, we must; Do better.
I'd like to say I'm Sorry. A bountiful, humble, heart open, I'm sorry.
And I'd like to invite you to do the same. Maybe you can't make it all right, right now. Maybe you don't know how.
But maybe, just maybe you can start with a simple, elegant: "I'm sorry and I will do better."
If you wish ... this is an invitation to declare a heartfelt "I'm sorry" in the comments below. You don't have to go into detail ... you don't have to tag anyone ... you just get to begin with "I'm sorry."
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