I was a robot for most of my life, completely walled off from my emotions. My weekday programming was work, sleep, repeat; on the weekends it was drink and hang out with emotionally unavailable men. Fortunately, I found yoga, and that’s where my spiritual journey began.
Little by little, I began to shed my metal exterior, get in touch with my emotions and let myself feel for the first time in my life. Once you start doing inner work, it’s a never-ending journey that requires a whole lot of letting go. Letting go of the emotional garbage you've been holding in your body, and letting go of those you love(d).
These men represent symbols of your former self who chose to pass on inner work and stay exactly where they were. These people can break your heart because you want them to come along for the ride. But let’s face it: we can’t fix people. They need to want to fix themselves.
If you are having a hard time letting go of relationships that are past their due date, here are some things that have helped me in my journey. I hope they help you as well.
1. Get with the concept of co-creation.
Before you come into your physical body, you have a plan of what you're going to learn in this lifetime and who is going to teach you. Know that you picked this person to teach you something. Instead of hanging on to what you know in your heart of hearts no longer serves you, bring your awareness to the lesson learned. Have gratitude towards that person for the clarity that was brought to you through that relationship.
2. Know that letting go creates space for a new reality.
When you hang on to men who aren't doing their inner work, it’s like a weight that holds you back from stepping into your full power. When you can let go, the weight is lifted and you're able to attract those who resonate with you in the here and now.
3. Be super cool with chilling in the unknown.
Let it be OK to be in a place of transition. Give yourself time to grieve the loss of love and your former self. Balance out the grief with activities that nourish you (yoga, dance, meditation) and friends who support you. Think of it as a time to pamper yourself before that next relationship, which will totally blow that expired one away.
4. Get clear on what you want from the next guy.
Dwelling on what didn't work from an expired relationship lowers your energetic vibration. Instead, focus on what you look forward to from the next guy.
- Write it down ("I look forward to...")
- While meditating, imagine having that relationship.
- Put together a vision board with the words or
images that capture your ideal relationship.
Any of those tactics sends a HUGE message to the universe that you're ready for the next guy to walk through the door.
5. He-tox your living space.
If you're doing the internal letting go, then it’s super powerful to do an external letting go. Clear your living space of that person’s energy, get rid of their stuff; you get the picture. This sends a power-packed message to the universe that you're creating space internally and externally for new energy to come into your life.
The bottom line is this: letting go is a process that doesn't happen overnight. It requires a boatload of compassion for yourself and for those you're leaving behind. It’s scary as heck, but have some blind faith that when you allow yourself to step into that new reality you’ll find men who you never knew existed, and you won’t want to revisit the ghosts of boyfriends past ever again.
Send me your shout outs! Which step resonated with you in this article?
If you want to understand how you can uncover the energy blocks stopping you from manifesting the life you want, check out my FREE Chakra Power teleclass on Wednesday, August 21 at 7pm EST. Go to www.chakrapowernow.com/getstarted to register.
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