So You Want Your Family To Eat Healthy: Here's Everything You Need To Know

Navigating the difficult, sometimes impossible-seeming waters of feeding our kids is one of the many great parenting challenges we all must learn to tackle. I add it to the list of the many lofty goals we undertake, which might include healthy sleep habits, independence, emotional intelligence and regulation, a love of learning, and good hygiene, to name a few. Like all of these important values we try to bestow upon our children, teaching our children to value healthy food is not the path of least resistance. While it can be incredibly challenging, I do believe this life skill is a worthy investment of our time and resources.

Often parents are incredibly focused on getting it right at mealtime, but snack time can fall short. The standard American diet for a child often relies on salty, crunchy, or sugary snack foods between meals. There is a time and place for these convenience store foods, but can you reduce your reliance on them? Can you look in your pantry or think about the food you are buying that is sabotaging your child’s ability to make healthier choices? Is there a box of crunchy crackers or sugary cookies that have become their go-to snack, and at times it is hard to convince them to consider anything else? Why not just skip putting this in your cart on your next trip to the grocery store?

I am a parent of a very discerning 4-year-old and a sometimes flexible 6½-year-old. I try not to use the term "picky eater" to describe my children or other children. This does not imply that my children do not at times exhibit the common qualities attributed to "picky eaters." I understand why we all use it, as it's a phrase that instantly helps us paint a clear picture of our children's food relationship. I will write about it from time to time as it's a parenting challenge many want to overcome, but I try not to apply this label to my children or other children (especially in their presence).

At times this label can be instantly limiting and can send a clear signal of our low expectations for our children's relationship with food. As parents we are often so thoughtful about not placing limiting labels on our child, and when it comes to their relationship with food, we should consider doing the same. Are we ready to wave the white flag that gives a child permission to be afraid of new foods and a free pass to avoid the unfamiliar indefinitely?

Playing with and preparing food is how a child can build a deeper connection to healthy food. I am a firm believer that it is OK for a kid to get a little silly with the food on their plate as they debate eating it. Infants learn to eat by manipulating food around their high chairs, which can be considered a form of playing.

Cooking with kids allows them to understand how the food ends up on the table. Participating in the process means they are more likely to taste or try new foods. Spending time in the kitchen will allow a child to gain skills that can teach them to fuel their health for a lifetime. Much of the work in the kitchen can be an engaging sensory activity and strengthen fine motor skills while helping you get a meal on the table. Most importantly, it can allow a child to gain a sense of confidence and accomplishment. Cooking with a preschooler can really slow you down, but you know what they say: It's about the journey, not the destination.

What we feed our child influences their preferences. We as parents often work so hard to prepare and discover our child’s favorite food, but what we don't understand is that what we expose a child to is helping them experience a range of flavors and textures to shape their taste preferences. It can take as many as eight or 10 exposures for a child to accept a new food. As parents, we must stay the course and not give up too soon.

Finding room in your family's busy schedule to prioritize meals together can be an empowering way to make shifts in your child’s eating habits. Family meals can place emphasis on slowing down, showing gratitude for the role food plays in nourishing our bodies, and connecting with your child. In some homes, mealtime can feel incredibly stressful for families concerned about their child’s eating habits, but it doesn't have to be. Try using this time sitting together to just enjoy your family as much as possible. Focus on modeling the eating behaviors you want to see and avoid engaging in power struggles as much as possible.

Most importantly, relax. Celebrate your successes, and remember that as parents, we are not going to get it right all the time. We are all a work in progress.