"I had so much anxiety this weekend," a client will share with me during a Monday session. "I had been feeling so good for the past couple of weeks, but this weekend I seemed to have taken five giant Read
Okay, let’s get you back on track right now!
I hear this kind of stuff all the time; even out of my own mouth! So whatever guilt you have swirling around about I should have..., I ought to..., I forgot to...,
LET IT GO, we’re moving on.
The missing link is so simple...it’s your answer to this very question:
Why do you want to lose weight?
Yes, that’s it. If we don’t have a reason to do something, we’re not going to do it. You can track your diet all you want, but at the end of the day, what's the point? This might seem obvious, but your reason for wanting to lose weight is unique to you. Your answer to this question must be kept in the forefront of your mind at ALL times so that you can commit to it and hold yourself accountable.
You might say I want to lose weight so I can be healthy. Okay but why do you want to be healthy? What does being healthy mean to you? How will this affect your life as you get older and how will it affect others in your life?
You might say, I want to lose weight to feel better about yourself. But why is feeling better about yourself important to you and how will it change things for you?
Maybe you need to lose weight to keep your job or get a new career. (Maybe your next act is to become a lifeguard, or police officer for example.) Again: why is having that job important to you and how will it make life better?
Maybe you're going for looks. Okay so what do you want to look like? Skinny? Curvy? Muscular? Define what you’re aiming for and why you feel you need to do this.
Let me be clear, this is not about losing weight for the right or wrong reasons, it’s just figuring out what drives you. There are NO wrong answers (unless you’re trying to lose an unhealthy amount of weight, in which you should seek help).
I looked in the mirror five years ago, after walking away from a from a domestic violent relationship, and I felt disgusting. I couldn’t even bear to look at myself. I was overweight and riddled with shame for letting myself get that way. It was January 1st and I decided right then and there I would lose 100 pounds within one year.
I did it. It wasn’t easy but I was able to keep my commitment only because I reminded myself every single day why I was doing it. There were two specific reasons why I wanted to lose the weight: (1) I was scared to death of getting diabetes or a heart attack after watching family members suffer from health problems; and (2) I desperately wanted to love myself again; I wanted to feel proud of who I was and not let my weight hold me back from living a fulfilling life.
I never wanted to be super skinny or change who I was, I just wanted to be healthy and feel good inside my own skin again. Being mindful about this made it so much easier to make better choices and change my lifestyle habits. When I find myself standing in line at Starbucks trying to decide if I should I get the brownie or the banana, all I have to do is remind myself of what matters to me (my health does!) and I usually go for the banana. (Of course, part of loving myself means going for the brownie once in awhile, too.)
It’s all about doing what feels right for you and keeping your actions in line with your reasons for wanting to lose weight. That’s it, that is the missing link! Success is yours once you fully commit to the why.
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