As I sat in deep meditation after a very powerful weekend workshop, I heard the words “feel don’t feed.” I knew right then and there those words were not mine and belonged to a greater source of wisdom. The workshop allowed me to experience a lot of emotions that I suppressed and ran away from for so long throughout my life. I sat there and I felt the pain deep in my heart and let me tell you, it hurt! It felt like someone punched me straight in the heart, but I did not run away or feed that pain, instead I just felt it for what it was. I was then able to release that deep pain and felt as my soul felt lighter.
I came to the deep realization that all my life I victimized myself and fed into those feelings of pain, sorrow, shame, guilt, self-hatred, lies, anger, and pity. When I was feeling bad, I fed into my emotions and made myself feel even worse. Those negative emotions had governed me for far too long. No longer do they govern and write my story, for I stopped feeding them. They have no food to survive on. I now feel my emotions, and when I do a world of solutions opens up to me. The next step is to have enough courage to take those solutions and make them a reality. This is still something I am learning and everyday a new opportunity. Everyday I am noticing this voice and recognizing its patterns. I presence myself to this entity inside of me and I observe it from a place of non-judgement. I let that voice pass through me and I then let it go. I don’t feed into my emotions, but I feel them. Once you can feel, you can release.
So why do we torture our souls and bury our pain deep within ourselves, knowing that it will never magically disappear? Why do we continue this long cycle of self abuse, therefore giving others the permission to abuse us as well? We feed our emotions rather than feeling them for what they are.
When we feed our emotions, we give it food for survival. For example, if I’m feeling angry, I will dig in my past to find all the times I was mad and use that as my ammunition. I will feed that beast inside me and so I get angrier. It’s a horrible and destructive habit that we as humans do unconsciously so often in our lives. We become consumed by our emotions and allow them to play out the story of our lives.
Suppression is the food of fear. So many people suppress their emotions, thus experiencing suppression from others in their lives. When we suppress our emotions, they are stored deep inside us, and this is very self-destructive. We store that energy until one day it bursts, and it is no longer in our control. This can be very scary and many times results in traumatic events and consequences. Suppression is a form of feeding. When we suppress our emotions, we feed into our fearful selves because we are too afraid to feel and deal with them right then and there. We believe that we don’t have the courage to face our feelings, which is initially only a thought/energy.
So what do I mean by feeling my emotions? To just recognize that at that moment you are upset or happy and to sit with that feeling and feel where it is sourced in your body and soul. This allows you to determine how that emotion makes you feel, mentally, physically, and spiritually, which opens up a world of answers! You can then further ask why it is you are feeling that way and meditate on a solution by having that question in mind. You will be surprised by what will come to you! I also call it being present with oneself. This is a concept that gets tossed around a lot these days but what does it really mean? It means to be in the present with what you are experiencing at that very moment. It means to live in presence of yourself; to be aware and awake of yourself and your Divine ability to be alive.
It’s a simple concept that is ascribed a huge complexity by the human mind. Our minds are powerfully tricky, many times choosing to enjoy an illusionary experience as opposed to the real one. Our minds are a powerful creative force, and many times we allow our minds to create our story rather than our hearts. We surrender our power to an entity that is within us all. It is what I call the “ego” - that voice inside our heads that judges everything we do and say. The one that will one day tell us we are not good enough, only to turn around and say we are. The voice that creates confusion and instability into your life, the “eternal liar” inside us all.
Millions in our world are emotionally constipated and find no release of everything they are holding onto. Millions go with lifetimes of pain on their shoulders and in their souls. Millions have no idea where to start this process of release and what it even looks like. Our true liberation lies in that emotional release, and there are powerful tools like meditation, prayer, and movement of our bodies that can be used to make this a reality. These tools help us awaken to the realization that we are the artists of our own lives. Only then can we start to paint a life of greatness! When we understand that we have the right to live a happy and abundant life, even in the most destitute of situations, is when we reach our true liberation. That is the moment when we really start living! So I challenge you all to get present with your emotions and feel them for what they truly are!