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10 Things That Naturally Calm People Do Every Day

Jacqueline Stone
Author:
April 16, 2020
Jacqueline Stone
Therapist
By Jacqueline Stone
Therapist
Jacqueline Stone is a therapist with a private practice in Sydney, Australia. She received her Masters in Educational Psychology and is a certified psychotherapist by the Counselling Federation of Australia. She specializes in EMDR, mindfulness, and trauma-Informed therapy.
April 16, 2020

Have you ever taken the time to observe a naturally calm person? They're a sight to behold: The way they glide through the day with ease, joy, and quiet confidence. I imagine you envy them as I do, but there's a lot we can learn from them about how to respond to everyday stress and frustration.

Here are 10 habits we can learn from naturally calm people:

1. They choose to walk.

Whether it's to meetings across town or shops up the road, calm people walk every day. The simple leg-stretching, head-clearing activity is mandatory for serenity. Get in the habit of working a walk into your days, getting off the bus or train a stop early if you have to.

2. They forgo rushing.

They leave plenty of time to get where they're going, and they don't cram too much in. If misadventure strikes, they drop something off their list, reschedule it, or they get there when they get there and apologize graciously. Rushing disturbs the peace and has no value. Be determined to quit this habit.

3. They prioritize self-care.

Sufficient sleep, good nutrition, and physical activity are nonnegotiable for calm people. These essentials are not sacrificed for a deadline or anything else. Make calming activities like meditating, reading, eating comforting foods, or taking supplements that help the body relax the backbone of your day, and get closer to the composure you crave.

4. They use routines.

Calm people minimize the strain on their working memory by doing some things the same way every day. Morning rituals, capsule wardrobes, meal plans, etc. make certain parts of their days predetermined. Operating on autopilot like this can minimize decision-making and ease day-to-day pressure.

5. They practice being in the moment.

Most calm buffs meditate, practice yoga, do tai chi, or have other formal mindfulness practice that keeps them fully present. You can choose surfing, gardening, or reading with your kids, but be diligent and practice regularly to get the stress-reduction effect.

6. They use their phones judiciously.

Calm people are not at the mercy of their phones. They simply use them as a tool for work and communication, maybe a source of music or news. You will not achieve peace or poise in your life if your phone dominates your day.

7. They self-regulate and exercise healthy boundaries.

They are self-aware and responsive to their mental, physical, and emotional needs. They take breaks, stretch and snack, or let off steam as required. Self-discipline and assertiveness enable them to say no, to ask for help, and to stop work at a reasonable hour. Practice tuning in and asserting your needs within yourself and with others, and enjoy feeling more in control.

8. They expect things to go awry.

Their unflappable nature comes from a deep knowing that life is unpredictable. They do not expect things to go to plan and they are ready to adjust to whatever the day throws their way. By all means have a plan, but be ready to change it at any moment.

9. They connect with the world authentically and meaningfully.

At some point every day, calm people engage in an activity that is not about success, money, or mere time-passing. It could be an exchange with a stranger, a call with a parent, or a creative pursuit.

10. They embrace their small place in the world.

Perhaps most of all, their contentment comes from knowing that they have a tiny place in the universe. They remain aware of the wide world beyond. They take their work and responsibilities seriously, but they do not carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.

All of these behaviors and attitudes are within your grasp, even though it may not be easy to make them a habit right away. Start small, start now, and enjoy all the calm you deserve.

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